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Rudy Park

Published 2018-01-14 (Image 166645)


Ive been told I can order a small mocha. Told? Because of my heart rate and activity level over the past seven days, Ive been allotted a daily limit of 1,426 calories. Im told thats just enough to include one small mocha. Hold on … theres vibrating ... Hold on ... hold on ... buffering ... Bing! Fitness overlords says Im one calorie away from a medium mocha. It says yelling burns one calorie. Ive got to get that app.

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