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Candorville

Comics about workers.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-01 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-01 Pub. Date: 2019-10-01
Image Number: 179726
Caption: Why did you just dump my kiwi-colada smoothies on my head? I'm glad you huff asked. Studies huff show that sitting all huff day long behind a desk leads huff to obesity, sickness, huff toe-swelling huff and an early, huff excruciating huff death. So more huff and more huff office workers are using huff standing desks huff with treadmills. Have you ever huff tried handing someone huff a smoothie while running huff on a treadmill? They walk ... Walk.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-30 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-30 Pub. Date: 2019-09-30
Image Number: 179725
Caption: Huff here's huff your huff tea huff … huff … huff … huff … I will almost certainly regret asking you this, but what on earth are you doing, you cretin? All huff across America, huff office worker are ditching huff their desks and walking huff on treadmills while they work. Can I get some water. Coming right up. Good thing I wore my tripping shoes.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-17 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-17 Pub. Date: 2019-09-17
Image Number: 179499
Caption: Sir, I demand you let me fire Dick Fink. He's condescending, slovenly, forgetful, always late, and I'm fairly sure he's made two attempts on my life. You have to learn to tolerate people who are different from you, Garcia. He's blackmailing you, isn't he. I've never even heard of Vegas and I deny everything.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-16 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-16 Pub. Date: 2019-09-16
Image Number: 179498
Caption: Dick Fink, if Lemont Brown calls, can you put it through? Afraid not, ma'am. I don't work on the Sabbath. The Sabbath is a day of rest. Even the Lord doesn't work on the Sabbath. The Sabbath is Saturday. Today is Monday. I don't consult calendars on the Sabbath.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-01 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-01 Pub. Date: 2019-09-01
Image Number: 179190
Caption: I want you to work on something when you get home, minion. I'm supposed to be able to rest once I've gone home. I've always wanted to have a trademark one-liner, like the heroes of all those old action movies. Like in Cobra. Sylvester Stallone was a rogue cop who told a criminal You're the disease, and I'm the cure. Or like in Total Recall, when Arnold Schwarzenegger's wife turned out to be an evil killer. He eliminated her and then said Consider that a divorce. Or like in They live, when just before he killed a bunch of evil aliens, Rowdy Roddy Piper said "I have come here to chew bubblegum, and kick (butt) ... and I'm al out of bubblegum. Your task tonight is to generate six one-liners I can use whenever I squeeze unpaid work out of my employees. I'm supposed to be able to rest once I've gone home. You're the rest, and I'm the bed. The kind with spikes on it ... See? That's awful. Fix that up and give me sixe more.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-17 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-17 Pub. Date: 2019-08-17
Image Number: 178999
Caption: Garcia, if you need birth-control pills for some medical reason, just tell us and maybe we'll change our minds about including it in your health insurance plan. Seriously? Of course. Tell us exactly what's going on with your lady parts, and then we'll make our decision. Pharmacy. Do you take Massacard?
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-16 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-16 Pub. Date: 2019-08-16
Image Number: 178998
Caption: I demand to appeal this to the other partners, Mr. Fitzhugh. You removing contraceptive coverage from my insurance is unacceptable. You earn six figures, Garcia. You can afford to buy your lady pills on your own. That's not the point. Health insurance is part of my compensation package. This is like you docking my pay. I expect to be paid in full for my hard work. Communist.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-15 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-15 Pub. Date: 2019-08-15
Image Number: 178997
Caption: Let me get this straight: You have a moral objection to covering birth-control pills, even though it's often prescribed for medical reasons. I shouldn't have to pay so that women can have sex without facing any consequences. But you don't have a problem covering Viagra and vasectomies ... even though Viagra only exists so that men can have sex, and vasectomies only exist so that men can have sex without consequences. That's different. men are supposed to sow their wild oats. Women aren't. Who do you think they're sowing oats with?!
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-14 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-14 Pub. Date: 2019-08-14
Image Number: 178996
Caption: I heard the boss switched out health insurance to a plan that doesn't cover lady pills. That's right, Dick. It doesn’t cover birth-control pills, IUDs or anything. Not true, Ms. Garcia. It still covers, Viagra, Cialis, vasectomies … anything a man desires. Are you gloating? Shake shake sh - Viagra. I wish I could chat, but I have a vasectomy at 2, followed by a vasectomy reversal at 4, and a vasectomy reversal-reversal at 6.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-13 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-13 Pub. Date: 2019-08-13
Image Number: 178995
Caption: Sir, why did you change my health insurance to a plan that doesn't cover contraceptives? President Trump issues a ruling allowing employers to refuse to cover any procedures that we disagree with either religiously or morally. And you have a moral objection to women controlling their own bodies? I have a moral objection to not saving a few bucks a month. Yayle. CEO of the year 2002.,
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-12 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-12 Pub. Date: 2019-08-12
Image Number: 178994
Caption: … So I replied What do you mean your charging me $90 for my birth-control pills? My insurance covers those. And guess what the pharmacist said, Mr. Fitzhugh. I couldn't begin to guess. He said Apparently your employer switched you to a new plan that doesn't cover sluttiness. Sir, did you say to pretend you have an important call after ten minutes, or after fifteen? Five! Explain.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-29 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-29 Pub. Date: 2019-07-29
Image Number: 178781
Caption: Thank you for coming in on your day off, minion. It reflects well on your character. I thought my job depended on it. I don't know how you got that impression. I would never force you to come in on your day off. That would be illegal. You said Come in on your day off. Your job depends on it. Rudy, Rudy, Rudy ... that's just a figure of speech. You went on to say I mean it. That's not just a figure of speech. That was a figure of speech too.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-25 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-25 Pub. Date: 2019-05-25
Image Number: 177721
Caption: Hey boss, that generic soap you gave me isn't really cleaning the cups. Mind if I go get some brand name stuff? Are you insane? There's zero difference between generic and brand name products. Corporate America just cons people into thinking You get what you pay for. Don't be a stooge, Rudy. Don't fall for it. Now get in there and scrub those cups, minion! Strike a blow for the little guy against corporate lies! Wait ... I'm very confused. Are you a right-winger or a left-winger? You mean in word or in deed?
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-05 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-05 Pub. Date: 2019-05-05
Image Number: 177448
Caption: What brings you to therapy, Mr. Jollee? My unhappy coworkers. Dr. Noodle. They're the ones with the problem, not me. I'm happy. All of the time. All of the time? Every moment, I greet the world with a smile and with laughter! No matter what's happening! Aaris brought donuts, and I said What a great guy! whenever anyone makes a sale, I lead a cheer! When Andy fell out the window, I shouted Cheer up! There're trees down there! Aim for those! What? The next day, everyone else was moping around, but not me. I put on a smile and said On the bright side, almost all the cactuses are still ok! ... and that's when they sent you to therapy. No, they sent me here after I gave the eulogy.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-21 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-21 Pub. Date: 2019-04-21
Image Number: 177255
Caption: My boss asked me if I'd consider getting a more professional-looking haircut. Dr. Noodle. I told him It is professional. I get it cut at Roscoe's Barbershop every two weeks. So then he said That's not what I meant. He said Think of cropping it short. So I said But Cody has longer hair than I do. So does Chad. And Bryan. And Todd. And Jack. And Spencer ... and you. So then he said he wasn't going to name names, but one of my coworkers told him my aggressive hair makes them uncomfortable. So I said to him that coworkers complaint, and you siding with them, is making me uncomfortable. What are you going to do about that? Let me guess ... He told me there was no need to be so aggressive.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-14 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-14 Pub. Date: 2019-03-14
Image Number: 176727
Caption: Well, you look down, Lemont. What's wrong? What could possibly be wrong? Today, the White House revoked my press credentials for asking one too many questions about Jared's security clearance … and the Democratic party revoked my press credentials for asking one too many questions about the whole Israel issue ... and Dizzyland revoked my season pass because of that expose I wrote about their horrible hourly pay. I still can't believe so many of their Ricky Mouses and Ronald Ducks are homeless.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-30 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-30 Pub. Date: 2019-01-30
Image Number: 176033
Caption: Yesterday at work, I said Aristotle was a moron. Someone over heard me. They told a co-worker, who told another … By the end of the day, the office was bitterly divided into a pro-Aristotle and anti-Aristotle camps. Aristotle was wrong about everything. He though men were superior to women and masters were superior to slaves. He was wrong about physics, about chemistry, about biology, about psychology, about astronomy, and about social justice. As if our country wasn't divided enough, you had to mess around and start this. I'm not sure I can even respect the pro-Aristotle people anymore.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-03 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-03 Pub. Date: 2019-01-03
Image Number: 175659
Caption: Hey boss, it's been 2019 for three days now. I'm just wondering, when am I getting my year-end bonus? About that, minion. I've discovered that your year-end bonuses are taxable. Ipso facto, the year-end bonus actually costs you money. That's why instead of giving you $1,000, I'll be taking $1,000 from your paycheck. That way you'll owe less taxes. You're welcome. Very. Bad. Man.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-24 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-24 Pub. Date: 2018-11-24
Image Number: 175068
Caption: Will work for $$$. Will make you fell like a hard worker by comparison, for $$$.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-14 worker 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-14 Pub. Date: 2018-09-14
Image Number: 173986
Caption: Whachoo gone an' canceled cable for, bruh? It's too expensive and I didn't watch most of the channels. I can see all my favorite shows on Netflix and Hulu for a fraction of the cost. That's selfish. Think of the ramifications. Think of the cable workers who gonna lose they job if erebody cut cable. Wait ... how did you know I canceled cable? (A) I don't know what you implying. An' (2) I don't even know how to tap somebody line to secretly share they cable.
     
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