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Mallard Fillmore

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1. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-06-17 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-06-17 Pub. Date: 2017-06-17
Image Number: 158911
Caption: Commencement speeches, the early years … and someday, one of you could be here, speaking on this very platform! All you have to do … is kill me.
     
2. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-06-16 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-06-16 Pub. Date: 2017-06-16
Image Number: 158910
Caption: And you leave this high school with something nobody an ever take from you. Because a fifth-grade reading level is sort of an intangible thing.
     
3. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-06-04 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-06-04 Pub. Date: 2017-06-04
Image Number: 158162
Caption: Click. Okay … so I clicked on "watch what this crab does when it sees a cheese puff." How'd you like me watching you all the time?
     
4. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-05-29 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-05-29 Pub. Date: 2017-05-29
Image Number: 158421
Caption: Moving forward … we'll be … moving forward. No, moving forward … Guess what this meeting is in no danger of doing?
     
5. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-05-27 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-05-27 Pub. Date: 2017-05-27
Image Number: 158168
Caption: Apparently this place spent way more effort making the funny little signs on the walls … than it did making the food.
     
6. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-05-16 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-05-16 Pub. Date: 2017-05-16
Image Number: 157895
Caption: Before we being this commencement ceremony … I'd like to ask those shouting "Death to America" to stop. But since most of them have tenure, I won't.
     
7. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-05-14 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-05-14 Pub. Date: 2017-05-14
Image Number: 157370
Caption: This was only a test of the emergency Conservative-Speaker System. If this were an actual public-university campus, I'd never be allowed to speak there in the first place.
     
8. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-05-09 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-05-09 Pub. Date: 2017-05-09
Image Number: 157634
Caption: And, since Ben Shapiro is banned from this campus … we've thoughtfully provided this cardboard cutout of Ben Shapiro for you to vandalize …
     
9. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-21 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-21 Pub. Date: 2017-04-21
Image Number: 156825
Caption: A. "Race" comment or "gender" comment. Q. What can you be 99% sure it's about whenever you hear this? I'm sooooooo sorry! I mean really, really, really sorry! I apologize for whatever it is I'm apologizing for whatever it is I'm apologizing for!
     
10. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-20 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-20 Pub. Date: 2017-04-20
Image Number: 156824
Caption: A. "Race" comment or "gender" comment. Q. What can you be 99% sure it's about whenever you hear this? I'm sooooooo sorry! I mean really, really, really sorry! I apologize for whatever it is I'm apologizing for whatever it is I'm apologizing for!
     
11. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-18 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-18 Pub. Date: 2017-04-18
Image Number: 156822
Caption: That whole Trump-surveillance story is really complicated, so we're bringing you this bicycle-riding dog story instead.
     
12. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-16 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-16 Pub. Date: 2017-04-16
Image Number: 156289
Caption: *#@! "Free speech"! If we don't like your opinion, we'll beat you up!! Remember Berkeley and Middlebury!! U. Not to mention that this exfoliant didn't give me a rash! The preceding was a simple suggestion to those cosmetics companies that insist on testing on animals.
     
13. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-09 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-09 Pub. Date: 2017-04-09
Image Number: 155999
Caption: No way can Chantel make a left turn … across four lanes of traffic … which was obvious before we got to this point. She could just turn right, then left, then left. Which is what those 43 cars … stuck behind us wanna do. I bet nobody's ever tried to make a left turn here before ... Wait ... I was wrong ... there's a plaque ...
     
14. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-08 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-08 Pub. Date: 2017-04-08
Image Number: 156295
Caption: "That's all the news." "Good night." "The news is over now." The preceding suggestions are offered as a public service to America's anchorpersons, to help avoid this … Wasn't that psychic cat story purrfectly great? That's the mews for tonight!
     
15. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-05 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-05 Pub. Date: 2017-04-05
Image Number: 156292
Caption: Americans now officially buy more bottled water than soda. Bottled water costs an average of 3,000 times more than tap water. Someone cue the professor … "This is why our enemies hate us!"
     
16. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-04-04 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-04-04 Pub. Date: 2017-04-04
Image Number: 156291
Caption: And we may see a few snowflakes this evening … That is such an offensive term! I wanna punch her. U. Um … she's the channel 3 meteorologist. Snowflake.
     
17. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-03-29 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-03-29 Pub. Date: 2017-03-29
Image Number: 156002
Caption: With a little practice, I could open a kiosk in a mall … and charge people money to rip holes in their pants! I'm surprised the government hasn't already thought of this.
     
18. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-03-28 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-03-28 Pub. Date: 2017-03-28
Image Number: 156001
Caption: Apparently there are blue jeans that cost $4,000! This is the kind of stuff that makes your professor say … this is why our enemies hate us! But what he'll never say it … our thinking that women and gay people and even infidels have rights is why our enemies hate us!
     
19. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-03-24 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-03-24 Pub. Date: 2017-03-24
Image Number: 155743
Caption: This just in … the current status of actual reality … has officially made virtual reality superfluous.
     
20. Comic Strip Bruce Tinsley  Mallard Fillmore 2017-03-21 this 
Cartoonist(s): Bruce Tinsley
Comic/Cartoon: Mallard Fillmore
Viewable Date: 2017-03-21 Pub. Date: 2017-03-21
Image Number: 155740
Caption: A. "How are your brackets doing in the NCAA tournament, Mr. President?" Q. What were the media grilling Obama about this time last year?
     
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