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Rudy Park

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-10-09 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-10-09 Pub. Date: 2019-10-09
Image Number: 179834
Caption: This is Anderson Cooper, live, at the scene of an incredible, unfolding story. A tiny internet café hit by hurricane, attacked by armed rebels, overcome with a mysterious disease, then saved! By an intrepid barista named Rudy Park. I was just a patriot doing my job. Like me, Anderson Cooper.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-08-31 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-08-31 Pub. Date: 2019-08-31
Image Number: 179123
Caption: Rudy, let's work together. Forget it. I'm a citizen journalist -- A lone wolf. I'll give you $15 per blog post plus bonuses based on how much traffic your stories attract. Nope. I'll let you cover Apple and you can get a discount iPod when you review the new product. Welcome to the big leagues. Welcome to the big leagues.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-08-30 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-08-30 Pub. Date: 2019-08-30
Image Number: 179122
Caption: Rudy, be reasonable. We can't have a functioning media if everyone starts putting up their own stories on the web. We need professional ethics. We need editing. We need fact-checking. We need … What are the words I'm looking for … House of Java.net Cybercafe. Less competition and profitable business model. I'm bored. Say something filthy.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-08-28 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-08-28 Pub. Date: 2019-08-28
Image Number: 179120
Caption: Professional journalists aren't the only ones qualified to cover stories. I understand about ethics and protecting sources and checking facts. Why are you using quotation marks? Press. I know how to get accurate quotes. Do you know about libel?
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-06-13 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-06-13 Pub. Date: 2019-06-13
Image Number: 178052
Caption: Rudy, listen to me. This didn't happen. I didn't get drunk and spend the afternoon playing video games with you. You're imagining things. You were drunk too. Your memory is compromised. Maybe you're right. Okay then. But my iPhone pictures tell a different story. You photographed us?! I'll get these posted on Facebook.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2019-02-01 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2019-02-01 Pub. Date: 2019-02-01
Image Number: 176041
Caption: How did you get a talking gerbil? Long, long, long story. My mom was a geneticist. My dad was a zoologist. They were in love once, but they loved their science more, and grew far, far apart. To save the marriage, they joined forces and created a talking gerbil, Herbert. A tiny creature to cherish and solidify their bond. Run for your life. I pooped myself. 'Twas a fool's errand.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-15 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-15 Pub. Date: 2018-06-15
Image Number: 172244
Caption: I got a tip about a huge geological calamity that's about to happen across the bridge. This story could make my site famous. Could you watch my boy while I go cover it? 'Course, bruh. For $4,000. Cool … what? I been reading Trump's Art of the Deal. It say if a brotha want something bad enough, charge him fifty times your usual fee. Are you sure that's in there? I demand to know what page. Ok. How much that information worth to you?
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-14 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-14 Pub. Date: 2018-06-14
Image Number: 172243
Caption: Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-27 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-27 Pub. Date: 2018-05-27
Image Number: 171404
Caption: What can I get you? Coffee? Tea? Sandwich? The mackerel mocha sounds lovely. What's in it? The usual. Chocolate. Soy milk. Mackerel. Yes, but is the mackerel farm-raised or from the sea? Ocean. Atlantic? Pacific? Indian? Arctic? Antarctic? I'm not sure. Oh. Ok ... well what's the mackerel's mercury content? Negligible, I'm sure. Ok. Was it exposed to any chlorine? Or copper sulphate? Or malathion? Was it treated with kindness? Was it read stories and sung to before bedtime? Yes. Never mind, it sounds iffy. Just give me the usual aspartame-trans fat medley.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-05 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-05 Pub. Date: 2018-05-05
Image Number: 171063
Caption: Boss? I was cleaning out the bunker like you said to, when I stumbled across blueprints for an O'Neill cylinder. You're imagining things, minion. The front page was a to-do list: Step five was herd genetically modified people onto orbital O'Neill cylinder. Step four was slip fattener into coffee. Step three was become minister of cafes. Step two: Elect Trump. Relax, it's just a short story I wrote in the '80s when I was a hatchling - I mean when I was a kid. Step one was assume identity of original Armstrong Maynard.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-15 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-15 Pub. Date: 2018-04-15
Image Number: 170066
Caption: Find me news about the Russiagate investigation. 841 news stories found. Specify date of broadcast. Today would be fine. Are you sure you would not rather see a broadcast from the future, when the results of the investigation are in? You can do that? Oh my god ... do you mean time isn't linear after all? Do you mean disembodied A.I. is free to move back and forth, like quarks can? I mean you should leave me alone until the results are in. (Sigh) fine ... Just show me anything that isn't about Russiagate. Processing ...
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-07 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-07 Pub. Date: 2018-03-07
Image Number: 169197
Caption: The Last Jedi dvd is going to have fourteen deleted scenes! Horrible mistake. The confident creator releases his work to the world and says This is it. This is what I want to show you. He doesn't then show you all the stuff he might have put in the story. Did Prince release the deleted stanza from Little Red Corvette where he also compared her to a Ford Pinto? Wait ... Prince compared a sexy lady to a Ford Pinto? Who knows? That's my point. Aren't you glad you don't know what?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-31 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-31 Pub. Date: 2018-01-31
Image Number: 167931
Caption: Let me tell you a story: The year was 1988. I was living in Detroit at the time. A young man named Matt Bennett spilled a drop of coffee on my shoe. He apologized profusely. I said, That's ok, dear, and we got to chatting. Turned out he was organizing a campaign stop for Michael Dukakis. So I told him You know what would make be vote for your boss? Show us he's tough. Maybe put him in a tank, and put a huge helmet on him. Show me he's an alpha male. I said I was sorry for spilling your tea. I will ruin you.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-30 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-30 Pub. Date: 2017-12-30
Image Number: 166544
Caption: John Barth wrote "Everyone is necessarily the hero of his own life story." That he did, little buddy. But what if a person spends most of his life watching tv, films, Youtube, Instagram, Facebook, etc? What if my -- I mean, this person's -- life story is watching other people's life stories? Does that make other people the hero of this person's story? Sometimes I don't know where I end and Kanye begins. That'd be somewhere around Kim Kardashian.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-29 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-29 Pub. Date: 2017-12-29
Image Number: 166543
Caption: Boss? Why've you been calling me "Sauron" all day? It's a hero's journey thing. Step 8, to be exact: The Ordeal. In the ordeal, the hero of the story faces a pivotal test of either strength or will. In Lord of the Rings, the ordeal was the face-off with Sauron. But why'd you start calling me that right after I asked for a raise? Denied, foul beast! ... Now, let me check my bank account for Step 9: The Reward.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-28 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-28 Pub. Date: 2017-12-28
Image Number: 166542
Caption: The guy who led the Pentagon's research into UFOs says they're real. Whooptie-doo. What else is new? The year was nineteen hundred and forty-seven. I was on guard duty in Roswell, New Mexico. To make a long story short … we came from different worlds. Her father did not approve. But her love for me is the only reason we still have a Northern Hemisphere. I promised not to call her and her father spared the planet, is what I'm saying. I got that.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-22 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-22 Pub. Date: 2017-11-22
Image Number: 165178
Caption: Disney's trying to buy Fox. If they did that, then all of Marvel's best heroes would be in the MCU. It would be horrible! The whole Marvel cinematic universe is one big story told by dozens of movies. This would, like, triple the amount of movies I'd have to watch! I'd have to watch every X-Men spinoff to make sure I got every reference made in any Thor or Avengers movie, for instance. HOJ. Your definition of "have to" and my definition of "have to" are very different. I'd have to see them all in 3-D. I'd have to get a second job to afford that.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-21 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-21 Pub. Date: 2017-11-21
Image Number: 165177
Caption: You're on "Ask Sadie." What's your problem?! The Senate. They tried AGAIN to repeal Obamacare, this time by hiding it in the tax bill. When's it going to stop? It's so repetitive. This reminds me of "Groundhog Day," that film where that lovely Mr. Bill Murray went from having a great personality to being a horrible loser. Um ... I don't think that's what you were supposed to take from the movie. There is one adorable deleted scene with a chainsaw. It's on the Youtube.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-06 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-06 Pub. Date: 2017-11-06
Image Number: 164673
Caption: Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Kevin Spacey. Specifically, we'll talk about that delightful television drama he stars in alongside one of my favorite actresses. Also, my tv has been at the repairman's shop for a couple weeks, so maybe you nice callers can fill me in on any big news stories I may have missed. Anyhow, I once met that nice young Mr. Spacey. He gave me a signed DVD of "American Beauty." I don't have a DVD machine, but I framed it because the cover is so lovely with all those roses ...
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-26 story 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-26 Pub. Date: 2017-09-26
Image Number: 163104
Caption: This is the Ask Sadie show. You're on caller. What's your problem? The Orville. Don't get me started. Orville Redenbacher stole his popping-corn recipe from Grandma Cohen. But … "but she stole it from Clarence Hornswaggler descendant of the guy who stole it from the Native Americans," Yeah everyone knows that story; it's fake news. No, I meant "The Orville," that "Star-Trek" type show by Seth McFarlane. What's that have to do with popcorn? Call back when you're not so confused. Next caller!
     
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