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Candorville

Comics about ruins and ruining.

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Result page:    2  3  4  Next  (65 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-23 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-23 Pub. Date: 2018-12-23
Image Number: 175261
Caption: Online shopping has ruined everything. The mall just laid me off to cut costs. Really? It's going to ruin Christmas. I was the mall Santa. Now where are the tiny kids and babies going to go to sit on a stranger's lap and tell him what they want under their tree? Where are they going to go to hear a man who'll say ho ho ho? Who'll pat them on the head? Who'll tell them to stop begging for handouts? Who'll tell them to stop crying, get a job, and pull themselves up by their own bootstraps? You sure they laid you off because of online shopping? Who's going to give them a copy of The Art of the Deal and send them on their way?
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-15 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-15 Pub. Date: 2018-12-15
Image Number: 175380
Caption: This is probably the last snow of the year, Clyde. For all we know, it could be the last snow ever. Want to go out and make snowmen like we used to? Nah, bruh. You wanna know why" … 'Cause I'm a grown-@#$ man. Let the memory show the only reason I didn't get dressed and trudge out into subzero weather to dig my hands in the snow is 'cause you ruined it. Why I feel like I been set up?
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-26 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-26 Pub. Date: 2018-09-26
Image Number: 174193
Caption: Why don't you like kids, Susan? I don't know. Maybe it's just that I don't like double standards. For instance … if a grown person ran from room to room naked, yelling booga-booga over and over again, he'd be locked up. But if a kid does it, it's magically ok? Seriously? 36 years later, you still won't let me live that down? You ruined my whole first holy communion.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-30 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-30 Pub. Date: 2018-04-30
Image Number: 171052
Caption: Want to come over? I'll watch old Star Trek reruns with you. No offense … but it's not really fun watching "Trek" with you. Just when I'm really feeling it, you always say something to cheapen the experience … You even ruined the single most shocking moment in all of Trek history: When the Borg assimilates Captain Picard and he announces his new identity to the crew. How did my saying I am locutus of bored ruin anything? You had your chance.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-18 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-18 Pub. Date: 2018-04-18
Image Number: 170576
Caption: I demand the right to fire Dick Fink, sir. He's incompetent, he's a snake, and I'm pretty sure he's the one who put that family of skunks in my desk. I'm still not sure I buy the skunks, Garcia … which reminds me, did you ever complete that course on personal hygiene? Don't change the subject. Dick Fink wants my job, sir. He's been trying to ruin me ... for year. I'm not imagining this. I know ... I sound paranoid. But that's all part of his secret plan. Take the rest of the day off, Garcia. 2002.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-10 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-10 Pub. Date: 2017-12-10
Image Number: 165352
Caption: I've been racking my brain trying to think of every interaction I've ever had with a woman. Dr. Noodle. I mean, when I was in my twenties, I did what guys in their twenties often did: I hit on women. Lots of them. We used to think that if a lady wasn’t interested, we just weren't trying hard enough. There were books about how to be more clever. How to be a pickup artist. There were times at the club when I was dancing with a lady, thought I had a shot, and went in for a kiss. Sometimes they didn't even know they were into me until I kissed them. But then they kissed back. Other times, they pushed me off and that was that ... or so I thought. Now, at any moment, some random woman could come forward and ruin my life. Well, lets start by acknowledging it's a healthy thing for society that men are learning what it's like to live in fear, for a change. Doesn't feel healthy.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-26 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-26 Pub. Date: 2017-11-26
Image Number: 165350
Caption: Women and men are coming forward and exposing all the powerful guys who've sexually harassed them. Its making me feel awfully worried and guilty. Dr. Noodle. Why? I'm worried that at any moment, a victim is going to come forward and ruin my life. That's natural. Think about it this way, though. If whoever it is you abused does come forward, you'll have a chance to come clean and clear your conscience. Huh? I've never abused anyone. I'm confused. I've already lost "House of Cards." This seems to be so pervasive, I could lose everything I spend my life watching. What'll I lose next, "Walking Dead"? "Man in the High Castle"? ... If they take "Big Bang Theory" my life'll pretty much be over. Just curious: Have you ever heard the phrases "get a life" and "it's not about you"? Hence the guilt.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-04 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-04 Pub. Date: 2017-11-04
Image Number: 164420
Caption: You know how China built all those huge mega-cities, expecting people to flock to them, but they're still mostly empty? It's kind of ruined one of my all-time favorite movies: "Field of Dreams." Apparently if you build it, they don't come. I posted an article about that on my site, but nobody's read it ... That's more proof. Dios mio.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-24 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-24 Pub. Date: 2017-10-24
Image Number: 164148
Caption: Hobbler Day Care. Saul Crusher speaking. Yeah, I'm Lemont Brown. Lionel's dad … Yeah, two-year-old Lionel. He told me you said he was "bad" because he didn't want to go to sleep at nap time. When you tell a kid so early in his life that he's "bad," it affects how he sees himself. I don't pay you $500 per week to ruin my baby boy's self-esteem. When I say "you're a bad caregiver," how does that feel? Imagine if you were only two.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-30 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-30 Pub. Date: 2017-04-30
Image Number: 156792
Caption: What brings you to therapy … "Steve"? I feel like everything is slipping out of my clutches. Dr. Noodle. I spent years cozying up to the boss, isolating him from the advice of others, stoking his paranoia. I subtly convinced him that everyone was against him and that he could trust no one but me and his family, and even they were a little fishy. I had him in the palm of my hand. I said "buy," he bought. I said "sell," he sold. I said "destroy," and he ruined the lives of the people I said were his enemies. I was the most powerful man in the world! I was the man behind the throne! Did I say I charge $100 an hour? I meant to say $1,000. But then I made the mistake of turning off his tv in the middle of Finding Dory. It's his favorite movie.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-14 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-14 Pub. Date: 2017-03-14
Image Number: 155653
Caption: What's with teenage girls running away to join ISIS? Are they crazy? Don't they know how they treat women? Some girls just can't help being drawn to "bad boys." And evil men are the "baddest" around. It's the excitement. It's the danger. It's the thrill of being with someone who could utterly ruin you ... er, I assume. I wouldn't really know.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-15 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-15 Pub. Date: 2016-12-15
Image Number: 152113
Caption: Maybe I should just go back to America and forget about "Vancouver." If I cross this street, walk up that hill, and knock on her door … I'll ruin it for both of us. In-person romance is way different from Facebook. In person, you can't delete or edit your comments before hitting "send." You can't send perfect photos with perfect lighting and perfect angles. I would say "Stop being a punk #@$%," but we don't cuss in Canada.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-08 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-08 Pub. Date: 2016-09-08
Image Number: 148217
Caption: Why don't you like kids, Susan? I don't know. Maybe it's just that I don't like double standards. For instance … if a grown person ran from room to room naked, yelling "booga-booga" over and over again, he'd be locked up. But if a kid does it, it's magically ok? Seriously? 36 years later, you still won't let me live that down? You ruined my whole first holy communion.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-07-30 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-07-30 Pub. Date: 2016-07-30
Image Number: 146475
Caption: I'm not the most confident guy. How can I build up my confidence? Simple. Interrupt erebody. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice. When you interrupt people in mid-sentence, it ruin they confidence. Throws them off they game. Then they even less confident than you. So what you're saying it, don't worry about building myself up, just tear the other guy down. That'll be $2.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-19 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-19 Pub. Date: 2016-04-19
Image Number: 142113
Caption: What's wrong? I'm ruined. When the Pulitzer board called yesterday to tell me I'd won this year's Pulitzer Prize for snarky criticism, Clyde answered, accused them of running a scam, and hung up. I cussed Clyde out. I called them back at the number they called me from, and apologized profusely. They asked me a bunch of questions to prove I was really me. So you got your Pulitzer Prize?! I got my bank account stolen by someone in Nigeria!
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-04-06 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-04-06 Pub. Date: 2016-04-06
Image Number: 141503
Caption: This is probably the last snow of the year, Clyde. For all we know, it could be the last snow ever. Want to go out and make snowmen like we used to? Nah, bruh. You wanna know why? … 'cause I'm a grown-a#$ man. Let the memory show the only reason I didn't get dressed and trudge out into subzero weather to dig my hands in the snow is 'cause you ruined it. Why I feel like I been set up?
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-03-09 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-03-09 Pub. Date: 2016-03-09
Image Number: 140180
Caption: I demand the right to fire Dick Fink, sir. He's incompetent, he's a snake, and I'm pretty sure he's the one who put that family of skunks in my desk. I'm still not sure I buy the skunks, Garcia … which reminds me, did you ever complete that course on personal hygiene? Don't change the subject. Dick Fink wants my job, sir. He's been trying to ruin me ... for years. I'm not imagining this. I know ... I sound paranoid. But that's all part of his secret plan. Take the rest of the day off, Garcia.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-02-10 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-02-10 Pub. Date: 2016-02-10
Image Number: 138873
Caption: Y'know what the thing be about Youtube, Big L? If you upload secret video you took of the worst double date in history, you can get 7 million views in just a few hours. But if you drop a music video you been workin' on for weeks, you get just a fraction of that. You recorded me on my date?! You uploaded it to Youtube?! We talkin' about my music video now. You've ruined my life, Clyde. Erethang ain't always about you, bruh.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-10 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-10 Pub. Date: 2015-09-10
Image Number: 132204
Caption: You didn't watch Donald Trump's press conference, did you? Which one you mean? You mean the press conference where you got up an' asked him why he think the KKK Like him so much … an' he had his bodyguard pick you up by your underpants an' throw you out? THAT press conference? I'm ruined. Nah, I ain't seen that, bruh.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-01 ruin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-01 Pub. Date: 2015-09-01
Image Number: 131899
Caption: I think you're wrong when you say Airbnb and things like it are ruining the economy and putting people out of work. A couple months ago, I was browsing their site. It made me really feel like traveling. So I took a weekend trip to Cameroon. But it turned out the Airbnb I loved wasn't any cheaper than a hotel, so I booked the hotel room. That's anecdotal evidence, Susan. Anecdotal evidence doesn't prove anything. How do you know that? Well ... from what I've seen, anecdotal evidence is often misleading.
     
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