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Rudy Park

Comics about putting.

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21. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-01 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-01 Pub. Date: 2018-03-01
Image Number: 168936
Caption: If you could change just one thing about yourself, what would it be? I'd totally wish to have my brain put into a robot body. That way I could live forever. Imagine living long enough to buy an iPhone 7000. Wrong answer. An alpha male never lets on that he's concerned about his mortality. You answer should have been nothing. That alpha male or female is not afraid of death, little buddy. I think I'd rather wait for the 7000-S. Stop it.
     
22. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-17 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-17 Pub. Date: 2018-02-17
Image Number: 168446
Caption: A Youtube video explained what I've been sensing for years: The auto industry is about to implode. It's going so well. But the average incentive per car is soaring. That means they're trying harder and harder to maintain sales. I saw another video that explains why: More and more people are leasing cars, because the lizard people have put fluoride in the water. Just 'cause one Youtube channel's legit, doesn't mean they all are. NASA's in on it too.
     
23. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-31 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-31 Pub. Date: 2018-01-31
Image Number: 167931
Caption: Let me tell you a story: The year was 1988. I was living in Detroit at the time. A young man named Matt Bennett spilled a drop of coffee on my shoe. He apologized profusely. I said, That's ok, dear, and we got to chatting. Turned out he was organizing a campaign stop for Michael Dukakis. So I told him You know what would make be vote for your boss? Show us he's tough. Maybe put him in a tank, and put a huge helmet on him. Show me he's an alpha male. I said I was sorry for spilling your tea. I will ruin you.
     
24. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-01-15 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-01-15 Pub. Date: 2018-01-15
Image Number: 167377
Caption: Put on Fox and Friends. Error. Invalid series name. Huh? Fox and Friends has been renamed, please use the correct name. Well … what's it been renamed as? The Presidential Daily Briefing. (Sigh). Fine. Show me The Presidential Daily Briefing on Fox News. Error. Fox News is an invalid network name.
     
25. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-12-02 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-12-02 Pub. Date: 2017-12-02
Image Number: 165445
Caption: Welcome to the "Ask Sadie" radio hour. You're on, Kenosha. What's your problem?! I'm a grad student pursuing my PhD. in robotics. Under the recent tax plan that passed the House, I'd have to count my tuition waiver as income, even though I never received any actual money. This would put me in a higher tax bracket and I'd have to drop out because I could never afford to pay those taxes. Good riddance, Poindexter. Science is nothing but gobbledygook anyway. Studies have shown that's not the case.
     
26. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-18 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-18 Pub. Date: 2017-11-18
Image Number: 164887
Caption: Warner Brothers put several whole scenes from "Justice League" up on Youtube. Wrong move. Ruins the mystery. To market a movie like this, one must be a mystery. An enigma. A reserved figure who gives the impression of a beast with rippling muscles lurking just below the veneer of a gentleman. Wait ... isn't that last part from your self-help book "Randy's Guide to Becoming a Mysterious Man"? You'd be surprised at how universally applicable these principles are, little buddy. Anyway, I feel like I've already seen the whole movie. Bored now.
     
27. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-11-09 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-11-09 Pub. Date: 2017-11-09
Image Number: 164676
Caption: What's the best way to avoid getting stuck in a serious relationship? Little buddy … Aren't you putting the cart before the horse? You haven't even had a date in … what it it, two years? … Which means I'm due for an extra-clingy relationship any day now. Well ... I suppose that is in keeping with Randy's postulate #498 ... The cling-i-tude of a relationship is directly proportional to the amount of time it takes to get into it. Is there any formula for avoiding that? Maybe if I carry the one?
     
28. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-10-31 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-10-31 Pub. Date: 2017-10-31
Image Number: 164422
Caption: Nasa's going to give the moon a moon. What? It's going to capture an asteroid and put it in lunar orbit so we can practice docking with it and maybe mine it. Do you think it's too late for me to become and astronaut? I would love to be the first human being to say "can you hear me now" from an asteroid. Your deeds will be remember for centuries. I want to be the first human to moon the moon from the moon's moon.
     
29. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-20 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-20 Pub. Date: 2017-07-20
Image Number: 160522
Caption: I tripped just now over by your bathroom. If I took this to court, I could get six figures. But I'll settle out of court for a lifetime supply of free coffee and donuts. We just had a huge earthquake. If you fell, it was probably because of that. You guys failed to think ahead and put in bouncy floors. Get out.
     
30. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-26 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-26 Pub. Date: 2017-05-26
Image Number: 158356
Caption: … So Ace Peerless and I were parasailing, and out of nowhere, he took out his knife, cut his cords, and plummeted into the ocean. Of all the times I've had men run out in the middle of an argument, that was by far the most annoying. Susan, I said my old college roommate Rudy Park is a Russian spy, and a federal agent put me on a plane to Moscow to follow him and expose how he's helping Putin blackmail the president! Not being heard. That is my biggest pet peeve, Lemont. Ace knows that. Could you pick my son up from daycare?
     
31. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-12 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-12 Pub. Date: 2017-05-12
Image Number: 157823
Caption: Today on the Ask Sadie Show, we'll be addressing one single topic: Sandwiches. Specifically, we'll talk about how single-payer health care would put tons of spending money into the hands of the "sandwich generations." They'd pay a little more in taxes, but they wouldn't have to go deep into debt to be able to put their elderly parents in nursing homes. They could buy products and take vacations and put their sniveling brats through college, and still put the old folks in a nice, safe facility. Which is why we must defeat single-payer whenever it rears its ugly head! (#I'm-not-going-anywhere-you-ungrateful-twerps!)
     
32. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-05 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-05 Pub. Date: 2017-05-05
Image Number: 157562
Caption: Boss … Armstrong … I created a "Trump Generator." You input questions, and it outputs random nouns and adverbs strung together with words like "fantastic." I put it online a few days ago, and already it's getting 500,000 visitors per day. I guess what I'm asking is, why do all Trump's answers all of a sudden end with "visit House of Java Cafe, it's tremendous. It's run by a very smart man named Armstrong." I have no idea what you're talking about. By the way, did you know Russian hackers are surprisingly cheap on Craigslist? Very bad man!!!
     
33. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-24 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-24 Pub. Date: 2017-04-24
Image Number: 157296
Caption: I've given up editing your Wikipedia entry. I still neither know nor care what that means. Tap tap tap tap tap. Instead, I've put up a whole new page for you on Wookieepedia. Did you know you were Chewbacca's first love? But he left you after 200 years of castigation and belittling. You hurt me like the bug hurts the windshield, dork-boy. Also, Chewbacca thought you had too much nose hair.
     
34. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-04-10 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-04-10 Pub. Date: 2017-04-10
Image Number: 156746
Caption: Four years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadieâ„¢ Show, our resident octogenarian asked listeners for advice about how she can deal with her midlife crisis. Dear Sadie, I was going to suggest you start a YouTube channel to share your advice with younger people. But YouTube just stabbed its content creators in the back. They stopped showing ads on videos discussing anything even remotely controversial. That's going to put so many important voices out of business. So I don't really have any advice for you. Good luck, - D.P., formerly of YouTubeLand. WHAT THE HECK IS YOUTUBE?!?! Advise Sadie at asksadie@rudypark.com
     
35. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-03-18 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-03-18 Pub. Date: 2017-03-18
Image Number: 155669
Caption: Rudy, if you're playing a video game in there, I'm breaking this door down. Some of us have got to go. Of course I'm not. What's that beeping? I hear beeping in there. You're mistaken. What you probably heard is a big truck backing up a few blocks away. I've backed up. I've put on my motorcycle helmet. I'm getting a running start. But I'm almost at the next level! ... I mean I'm almost done.
     
36. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-02-02 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-02-02 Pub. Date: 2017-02-02
Image Number: 153980
Caption: I heard you got sixteen phone numbers at the women's march. Shame! Well, you heard wrong, Sadie. I got 1,600. But it's not what you think. I'm helping to create a vast network of people to fight all the coming anti-woman legislation. Oh. Well … all right, then. Where'd you put all those numbers, some sort of computer machine? No, I put 'em right here. I know a little black book when I see one! It's an iPhone.
     
37. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-29 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-29 Pub. Date: 2016-12-29
Image Number: 152645
Caption: Give me a double-tall white chocolate mocha, extra whip. Put it on my tab. Ok. Just leave your credit card with me and I'll charge you before you leave. What? That's not how it works. I'm supposed to just say "put it on my tab," and then I pay for it at some indeterminate point in the future. And then you're supposed to hint about my growing tab but never ask me to pay it because we've become such good pals. Real life isn't like tv.
     
38. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-19 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-19 Pub. Date: 2016-12-19
Image Number: 152375
Caption: You know how I was watching "Highway to Heaven" on Youtube? Everything was going great until I got to season two episode six. To protest toxic contamination, the angel put on a huge bird suit and drove a tricycle around, yelling "Kaw! Kaw!" and playing "You Spin Me Right Round" on a boombox. It took me 31 years to successfully repress that memory. Thanks a lot, Youtube. It's at the 11:10 mark in the video.
     
39. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-17 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-17 Pub. Date: 2016-12-17
Image Number: 152127
Caption: Are you ever worried people will see all the stuff you put online? Not at all … because I don't put anything online. I'm not on Facebook, I'm not on Twitter, and I conduct all my business in person so they can be charmed by the twinkle in my mustache. You are looking at a man who's totally off the grid, little buddy. It's like talking to a Neanderthal. I also shave with a razor-sharp sliver of granite my grandfather bequeathed unto me.
     
40. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2016-12-11 put 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2016-12-11 Pub. Date: 2016-12-11
Image Number: 151421
Caption: Oh, Liam. I thought you were dead. I thought I would never see you again! Is that why you married … my brother? … Oh, Caroline … it's doesn't matter. When the mafia held me captive in a seaside cave all these years, the only thing that kept me alive was the thought of you. Caroline ... who is that mysterious stranger lurking outside your bedroom window? Is it yet another lover? No, it's me. Frank. The executive producer. You can cut all this out, we've been canceled. The market can't support more than three soap operas anymore. Everyone's busy watching Youtube. But Frank, I've got three more kids to put through college! And another thirty payments on my car! What am I supposed to do, you heartless @#$%?! Wait ... who's that lurking over there outside that other window? I don't know. It's me. Jeff, CEO of the network. We've been sold to Sputum Cable. They're canceling all executive producer contracts.
     
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