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Candorville

Comics about points and pointing.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-19 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-19 Pub. Date: 2020-01-19
Image Number: 181257
Caption: My 3-year-old asked me how many dimensions we live in. Can you believe that, Clyde? Believe what? What I just said. You wasn't listening neither? Of course I was. I don't know, bruh. If I been listening to somethin', I don't need to ask people 'bout it later. No, What I just said was an answer. I don't know. What did you just say was an answer? That's ... sigh ... Let me start over. My little boy asked if we live in three dimensions. I said We live in three special dimensions, but there's a fourth dimension we live in called time. The fourth dimension called time what? They don't get along? At what point in the fourth dimension did you decide to just mess with me?
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-11 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-11 Pub. Date: 2020-01-11
Image Number: 181117
Caption: Whachoothink caused the Big Bang? Well, some speculate that the inflaton field phase-transitioned toward a vacuum state, where it then propagated outward from the nucleation point. Others believe God snapped her fingers. I just meant was that a gun shot I hard, or a car backfiring? Of course you did.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-07 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-07 Pub. Date: 2020-01-07
Image Number: 181113
Caption: Governor Newsom sure came down on you for that article you wrote about Mayor Pete's fancy wine cave fundraisers. Yeah. He said There are literally hundreds of Democrats that have been in that same cave … which was a good point. So I wrote a new article called When everyone is corrupt, then no one is corrupt. Hate the game, not the player, Lemont. Aphorisms are just 2% less lazy than memes, Susan. I hit dog will holler. Stop that.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-28 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-28 Pub. Date: 2019-12-28
Image Number: 180959
Caption: Tyrone, I get the feeling the new year will either be very food or very bad. But nothing in between. We are at a crossroads, my friend. No, we are not. What we are at is an inflection point. What? That's the same thing I just said. Nonsense! My portentous cogitation had far more syllables. That's not ... sigh ... things are not off to a good start. Not true. What is happening is, we are apperceiving a foreboding embarkation.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-12-15 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-12-15 Pub. Date: 2019-12-15
Image Number: 180764
Caption: I've decided to become a whistleblower. It's the latest thing. I'll report on how the boss called his coffee bean supplier in Ukraine and tried to extort them into announcing that out main competitor, Coffee King, is corrupt. He wanted them to lie and say Coffee King bought radioactive coffee beans from Chernobyl. My whistleblower report will be all over the news. It'll prompt an investigation. Naturally. At which point, the boss's cronies on the city council will deflect attention by demanding to know my identity. I'll finally be famous! So? Nobody would even know your name. That's perfect. We famous people value our privacy.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-21 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-21 Pub. Date: 2019-11-21
Image Number: 180467
Caption: The next election may be the last election. Russia hacked election systems in all fifty states last time. All signs point to that being just a trial run. And since one of our parties has spent the last couple decades suppressing votes, half the country has been trained not to care whether elections are fair. I think all votes should count, when they're cast by the right people. I heard that.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-17 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-17 Pub. Date: 2019-10-17
Image Number: 179917
Caption: Jodie at work called me a Type A person. It offended me. Type A's are ambitious, outgoing, proactive, concerned with time-management … but they're also rigidly organized. I specifically planned to be flexibly organized at this point of my life. Couldn't you just move flexible to your fifties? That would throw everything off!!!
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-16 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-16 Pub. Date: 2019-10-16
Image Number: 179916
Caption: I counted fifteen punctuation errors on your site in the past five years, Lemont. It's not a huge number, but it's the kind of thing that can damage your Q rating. I propose a 3-phase operation: Hire an editor to prevent future occurrences … Have my people scrub all your past articles to correct every error ... and have a foreign troll farm impugn the intelligence of anyone who's ever pointed out those errors. When's your vacation over? You really need to go back to work.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-11 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-11 Pub. Date: 2019-09-11
Image Number: 179396
Caption: What're you so excited about, Clyde? I'll put it this way, Big L: Ain't you never got nothin' you didn't expect to be getting' … come to realize you been waitin' on it for half your life an' you didn't never even know it? Was pushing my buttons the whole point of all this? 'Course not, Big L. I just forgot you can't never stand double negatives.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-08 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-08 Pub. Date: 2019-09-08
Image Number: 179293
Caption: Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Send your questions to asksadieshow@gmail.com. Dear Ask Sadie, My best friend chews, loudly, with his mouth open. It embarrasses me every time we eat out. I'm afraid if I point it out, it'll ruin our friendship. Do you have any suggestions as to how I can get the point across without hurting his feelings? - Andrea in Anaheim. Excellent question. Here's what you do ... Next time you eat lunch with your friend, bring a newspaper. Every time he chews with his mouth open, roll up the newspaper and swat him on the nose with it. Then say It works for my poodle. If he laughs instead of pressing charges, you'll know you've got a real friend. *MGMT accepts no responsibility for the possibly horrendous consequences of Sadie Cohen's advice. Use at your own risk.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-16 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-16 Pub. Date: 2019-08-16
Image Number: 178998
Caption: I demand to appeal this to the other partners, Mr. Fitzhugh. You removing contraceptive coverage from my insurance is unacceptable. You earn six figures, Garcia. You can afford to buy your lady pills on your own. That's not the point. Health insurance is part of my compensation package. This is like you docking my pay. I expect to be paid in full for my hard work. Communist.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-08 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-08 Pub. Date: 2019-04-08
Image Number: 177113
Caption: California accounted for 75% of all new jobs in February. Pareto Principle. It's how the world works. 20% of the people own 80% of the land. 20% of my clients give me 80% of my sales. I bet if we studies it, we'd find that 20% of what happens to us gives us 80% of our memories. Technically, California only has 12% of the population, not 20%. 20% of the time, you get 80% of the point.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-15 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-15 Pub. Date: 2019-03-15
Image Number: 176728
Caption: You sure in trouble now, Big L. All I did was write an article quoting what Ilhan Omar actually said … and pointing out that most of the people we see loudly insisting it was antisemetic seem to not be Jewish. I've seen a lot of Jewish people coming to her defense. So maybe it's more complicated. That's all I wrote ... so I have no idea why Congress passed a resolution against me. Ain't nobody in the mood for complicated no more, bruh.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-16 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-16 Pub. Date: 2019-02-16
Image Number: 176286
Caption: One of my readers got really upset when I pointed out Aristotle's many mistakes. She said Aristotle may have been wrong about everything … but he created the scientific method that other people used to prove he was wrong about everything. Fair point. So what did you say? What else could I say? I said It's 3 a.m. Momma, please stop calling me about this. I think your phone is ringing.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-05 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-05 Pub. Date: 2019-02-05
Image Number: 176171
Caption: I found out something last night that just totally destroyed my entire worldview. The burrito, as most Americans know it, did not actually come from Mexico. Or maybe it did. The internet is of two minds about the issue. The point is, if you can't count on the burrito being Mexican, you can't count on anything. I have something to tell you about Chop Suey.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-19 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-19 Pub. Date: 2019-01-19
Image Number: 175845
Caption: I've never had so many people tell me to go !@#$ myself in my whole entire life, Susan. All I did was write an article called It's Time to Make Private Schools Illegal. You did what? The theory is, if the children of millionaires and billionaires had to go to public school, you can bet they'd make sure our public school systems were amazing. It's not a bad idea. Half the comments I got misspelled !@#$. So I wrote another article about how that proved my point.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-18 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-18 Pub. Date: 2019-01-18
Image Number: 175844
Caption: I read your new article about Jazmine Barnes getting shot. What'd you think? I think you were right about gang violence and about fatherless homes and about uneducated, hopeless young men. But you were dead wrong about gun control, and about taxpayer-funded daycare and youth camps, and about pouring tax dollars into poor school districts. So ... you like pointing out problems, but you hate pointing out solutions. Is solutions the name of your Marxist unicorn?
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-09 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-09 Pub. Date: 2019-01-09
Image Number: 175738
Caption: The universe is expanding so fast that in one trillion years, all evidence of the Big Bang will have disappeared from view. Oh wow. About 600 million years from now, earth will experience its very last solar eclipse. In less than 100 million years Saturn's rings will be gone. It's amazing that we live at exactly the right time to witness these things. That's a beautiful point, Lemont. You should stop there. In just one year, Game of Thrones will be over forever.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-02 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-02 Pub. Date: 2019-01-02
Image Number: 175658
Caption: Ever since I was five and saw The Menagerie, I wondered what it'd be like to see a Star Trek series featuring Captain Pike. I'm finally getting that, sort of, on season 2 of Star Trek Discovery. Proves nothin', bruh. I ain't even sure what that all mean. It's like you threw a bunch of random nerd words together an' pretended it made a point. Captain Picard is back, too. And so's The Orville. I'm just sayin, that and a new season of the expanse means 2019 is the year miracles happen. Stop that.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-10-27 point 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-10-27 Pub. Date: 2018-10-27
Image Number: 174605
Caption: What'd you mean when you called it the Republican Supreme Court? They're not all Republicans. Ever since the Republicans voted as a bloc in 2000 to end the recount and make Bush president … and with all the 5 to 4 votes … it's become increasingly clear that the court is a political body, just like Congress. There's no point in pretending it's still some unbiased arbiter of justice. Nothing's legitimate anymore. This is just like the last days of Rome.
     
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