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Rudy Park

Comics about men.

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101. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-16 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-16 Pub. Date: 2017-09-16
Image Number: 162614
Caption: Boss, the customers are demanding to know why the muffins taste like ground cardboard. There was a sale on week-old organic oat bran and cardboard muffins. Should I tell them that? Depends. Are the men wearing lumberjack beards and hipster glasses? And are the women wearing Salvation Army clothes and hipster glasses? Yes. Tell them.
     
102. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-09-12 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-09-12 Pub. Date: 2017-09-12
Image Number: 162610
Caption: Can I ask you something man-to-man? What's up? Let's say a … friend of mine … was so focused on building his corporate empire that he has very little time for romance. And let's say my … friend … hired a surrogate to seduce someone, get married, and have children ... all while wearing a hidden camera so I ... I mean, my friend ... could experience it vicariously. Would that be weird? Long talk ahead.
     
103. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-25 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-25 Pub. Date: 2017-08-25
Image Number: 161810
Caption: Randy, do you think we're going to war with North Korea first or with Venezuela first? Neither one, little buddy. But … President Trump is threatening them both. Yes, but you're forgetting Randy's Axiom #467.1 … "Everything blows over when it's a small man making big threats, asterisk." "Asterisk"? Randy's axiom #467.2: "Those who want to sleep well never ask about the asterisk."
     
104. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-15 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-15 Pub. Date: 2017-08-15
Image Number: 161544
Caption: Where would you like to go before you kick the bucket, Mort? Easy: Africa, circa 2.5 billion B.C. That's where mankind's ancestors first arose. I could instill my progressive values in humanity from the very beginning. The homo habilis would pass my wisdom down through the ages. By the time Cro-magnon man emerged, we'd already have single-payer health care and a universal basic income. I meant in 2017. Oh ... then ... Denny's.
     
105. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-08-13 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-08-13 Pub. Date: 2017-08-13
Image Number: 160983
Caption: What was it you wanted to talk about, minion? There's a guy from Immigration and Customs Enforcement out front, boss. Oh, that. ICE said someone would stop by to thank me for tipping them off to all the illegals who were hanging out at Muhammad's Bean Pie Shack. What? Why would you do that? Because I'm a patriot. In times like this, every patriot must do his duty. If we have good reason to suspect a bean pie shack is a gathering place for people who shouldn't be here, it's our solemn duty to report it, so it'll get shut down. This wouldn't happen to have anything to do with how you've been looking for ways to boost our bean pie sales, would it? Coincidence. Don't be a conspiracy theorist, minion. Oh, and go tell ICE I have another tip for them. Very bad man.
     
106. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-27 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-27 Pub. Date: 2017-07-27
Image Number: 160766
Caption: It's important to women that a man has a good relationship with his mother. Why's that? House of Java .Net Cybercafe. Because how a man treats his mother is a good indicator of how he'll treat a girlfriend. That's why I created an app that calls your phone and displays a photo of you hugging your mom whenever a gorgeous lady is within three feet of you. It also displays a nice, sweet lady whenever you're within three feet of your mom.
     
107. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-19 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-19 Pub. Date: 2017-07-19
Image Number: 160521
Caption: Did you feel that, Randy? I think I was an earthquake. Tough to tell, little buddy. I had just come up with an idea for a new book in my "Randy's MAN-uals" series. The working title would be "The Back-Hair Formula: How to Ensure Your Inner Beast is a Lion, Not a Woolly Mammoth" I'll have to shorten that, of course. The earth often shakes when I get a good idea. Well, my mind was completely blank at the time, so ... pretty sure it was an earthquake.
     
108. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-08 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-08 Pub. Date: 2017-07-08
Image Number: 159996
Caption: Tonight, on "Cops," a local man leads police on a high-speed chase through Best Buy. It all began when clerks notices he was coming in every day to upgrade different obsolete items. When he ran out of his own obsolete hardware, he began rummaging through other customers' pockets looking for old cellphones to upgrade. He zoomed free, but cops had no trouble tracking the perp down. Please don't be Rudy. Please don't be Rudy. Please don't -- Maybe next time "Rudy" will think twice before personalizing his Segway's license plate.
     
109. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-03 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-03 Pub. Date: 2017-07-03
Image Number: 159991
Caption: You're a man of the world, Mort. You've seen things in your time, haven't you? I've seen things that would curl your toes. I've seen dust as tall as mountains sweep across the plains. I've seen a swami mystic turn a dying beggar into a soaring dove on the banks of the Ganges. I've seen Republicans and Democrats work together to pass legislation that moved America forward. You had me until you got to that fairy tale. I've seen a time when houses cost just twice your annual income.
     
110. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-07-02 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-07-02 Pub. Date: 2017-07-02
Image Number: 159273
Caption: Greetings from the alternate universe where America lost the revolution. What was that, now? Oh, I see. You're in one of the universes that hasn't yet discovered inter-universal travel. I shall explain … Please do. America lost. In 1833, Britain freed the slaves, one of whom had a daughter who grew up to invent the transistor 90 years earlier than in your universe. We had desktop computers. A moon colony, and the Benjamin Banneker orbiting telescope had identified over 3,000 extrasolar planets, all by 1947. So when the alien ship crashed at Roswell, we all knew it was real, especially since a crumpet farmer named "Mac" Brazel took a selfie amidst the wreckage and uploaded it to Facebloke. Long story short, using the ship's zero-point-energy transdimensional drive tech. We've developed a booming alternate-universe tourism industry. Anyhow, I'll have tea and shepherd's pie, please. That's Monopoly money. No, that monocled man is King Thurston III, our beloved monarch. Nice try.
     
111. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-30 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-30 Pub. Date: 2017-06-30
Image Number: 159730
Caption: Meanwhile, in Candorville … " … and the aria turned, smiled sweetly, and stepped off the cliff." The Last Book Store. Meet the author! Thank you, thank you so much. Any questions. I've got a question, miss. Lysurgus Cup. The Willow Chronicles. Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Wow! Clap! Clap clap clap. How hungry are you? I knew a French place around the corner. Wanna get out of here? Yes. I mean NO. I mean, I'm working here. And I've got a man. Lemont. And I AM hungry though. And no! I'll be outside on the Harley.
     
112. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-27 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-27 Pub. Date: 2017-06-27
Image Number: 159727
Caption: That's a shame. What's a shame? Did I do something wrong, officer? TSA. Yes, you did. You let your boyfriend turn you down. So what if he's 15,000 miles away in Russia? If I were your man, I'd never let that stop me. I would fly to the ends of the earth for you. This routing ever work for you? Good lord this routine must work for you.
     
113. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-13 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-13 Pub. Date: 2017-06-13
Image Number: 159164
Caption: People see me as a heartless, miserly man whose pursuit of money leaves him with no room for personal relationships. It's taken me a long time to cultivate that image, Randy. But sometimes, when I'm home alone in the cold of the night, I long to feel a warm, comforting body beside me. That's why I've started warming my life-size doll made of $20 bills in the microwave. Is that weird? To each his own.
     
114. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-12 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-12 Pub. Date: 2017-06-12
Image Number: 159163
Caption: Can I ask you something man-to-man? What's up? Let's say you're delivering your usual enormous campaign contributions to the members of the city zoning board to ensure no potential competitors can open a café within 50 miles of our own. And let's say you realize you've fallen madly in love with one of the cronies you're bribing. Does it violate any sort of guy code to pursue a romance with you own crony? Very long talk ahead.
     
115. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-11 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-11 Pub. Date: 2017-06-11
Image Number: 158456
Caption: Man, Lemont … how long's it been? Twenty years? Just about. You still working at Pigville Pork Burgers? Nah … I got a job as the Candorville Chronicles White House correspondent. Then I went on to found Candorville.com, the internet's seventh largest source for news and opinion. Oh. That's cool. That's cool. How do you not know this? We're Facebook friends. I post links to my articles every day. We were roommates all through college, and you don't even read my updates? Facebook's for reading you-stuff? I thought it was just for posting me-stuff. I'm sorry, man. I feel horrible. As you should ... Anyway, you still working as a roadie for Hootie and the Blowfish?
     
116. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-06-05 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-06-05 Pub. Date: 2017-06-05
Image Number: 158831
Caption: To: Rudy Park. From: Lemont Brown. Hey Rudy, it's me. Long time no talk. How are you these days? Lemont? From Berkeley? Tap tap tap tap. Yeah. Man … Putnam Hall 1993. Those were the days. What ever happened to our roommate Ken? Tap tap tap tap tap tap. Divided Airlines. Divided Airlines. You know, that freak who was always writing articles about "news" and junk for the school paper ... That MORON who didn't know a Gameboy from a GameGear ... That big baby whose mommy was always calling to check on him ... Tap tap tap. Um ... that wasn't Ken. That as me. That great guy who could always take a joke ... Tap tap tap tap.
     
117. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-27 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-27 Pub. Date: 2017-05-27
Image Number: 158357
Caption: I know why you're such a greedy, heartless scrooge, Armstrong. It's because deep down, you just want to be loved. But you're afraid of rejection, so you make yourself as unlovable as possible. That's the type of utter nonsense to expect from muscle-bound oaf who hadn't paid his tab in 13 years. I love you too, man. I hope you get audited.
     
118. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-26 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-26 Pub. Date: 2017-05-26
Image Number: 158356
Caption: … So Ace Peerless and I were parasailing, and out of nowhere, he took out his knife, cut his cords, and plummeted into the ocean. Of all the times I've had men run out in the middle of an argument, that was by far the most annoying. Susan, I said my old college roommate Rudy Park is a Russian spy, and a federal agent put me on a plane to Moscow to follow him and expose how he's helping Putin blackmail the president! Not being heard. That is my biggest pet peeve, Lemont. Ace knows that. Could you pick my son up from daycare?
     
119. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-21 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-21 Pub. Date: 2017-05-21
Image Number: 157666
Caption: Ask Sadie. Our resident surly lass answers actual reader questions sent to rudy@rudypark.com, and posts answers to www.rudypark.com. Dear Sadie, My husband keeps leaving his stuff all over the place and expecting me to pick up after him. How do I get through to him that this isn't the 1950s? - Angry in Anaheim. What is wrong with you?! He doesn't "expect you" to clean up after him! He doesn't care whether you leave his boxers on the coffee table or not. You are the one who cares. You are the only one who cares if things get picked up or not. He would only start caring at the point where the pile gets high enough to block his view of the tv. It's as if you've never even heard of the male species. Ask Sadie, baby!
     
120. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2017-05-18 man 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2017-05-18 Pub. Date: 2017-05-18
Image Number: 158091
Caption: Rudy, you can't meet with the Russians. It'll be a disaster of epic proportions. How so? What could possibly go wrong? There are always unintended consequences with Russia. It was summer of 1988. I was a teenager on a one-man goodwill tour across the Soviet Union. Just me, my Harley and my leather jacket ... that is, until I visited the Kremlin. Let's just say I rode the last few thousand miles of that journey with a beautiful older blonde named Irina clinging to my back. Her father Mikhail was furious. He was so distracted for the next year that his entire country fell apart. Wait ... who was her father? Remind me to show you my Presidential Medal of Freedom.
     
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