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Rudy Park

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61. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-27 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-27 Pub. Date: 2018-08-27
Image Number: 173795
Caption: Great news. I got an iPhone. Shut up! You did? Is it not awesome? It is not. Huh? You mean it is awesome or it is not awesome? Yes. Let us begin again. Is it not the greatest device of any kind ever invented? You're making no sense. My point: I hate the iPhone. You're making no sense.
     
62. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-21 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-21 Pub. Date: 2018-08-21
Image Number: 173684
Caption: Fireside Chat with: Recession Man! (A superhero who comes to the aid of gals distressed by tough economic times). What's your superpower? What's yours? What makes you so wonderful? Pardon? How did you learn to ask such incredibly great questions? How do you feel, I mean, really feel? Oh, you're a super listener? Let's not make this about me. R.
     
63. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-17 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-17 Pub. Date: 2018-08-17
Image Number: 173525
Caption: I was going to make you a rich woman, but you're done. Fine with me. I don't care what percentage I'll get. I won't let you play with my reputation. I won't let you trade in fake scandal. Perfect. What? We got your anger on videotape. Your redemption is complete. You're back on the air. Even my head is spinning.
     
64. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-11 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-11 Pub. Date: 2018-08-11
Image Number: 173399
Caption: Thirty-two. Pardon? The number of babes I've necked with this summer. Thirty-two. Twenty-nine if you count sisters only once 'cause they're in the same family. You hate me. I hate you!!!
     
65. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-06 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-06 Pub. Date: 2018-08-06
Image Number: 173394
Caption: Over the last decade we've chronicled modern life through the joys and tribulations of the Rudy Park gang. They've lent us a window into the key issues of the day, from politics to nutrition to the way our whole world is shaped by HBO's programming choices. But we've been remiss. Somehow, in all this time, we've never had a storyline involving a secret scandalous videotape of a major character's illicit past. This week, we humbly make amends. We recommend that the more squeamish among you spend this week instead reading US magazine, or watching C-Span or whatever else your weak-kneed sensibilities require. Stay tuned ...
     
66. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-01 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-01 Pub. Date: 2018-08-01
Image Number: 173259
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, You are amazingly funny. What is your secret? -Alexandria. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Losers. Pardon? Every time I see a whiny, pathetic, technology-addicted jerk, my only possible release is to make a joke at their expense. You hear this one? A Rudy walks into a bar with a bird on his head ... NOT FUNNY! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-09}
     
67. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-23 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-23 Pub. Date: 2018-07-23
Image Number: 173108
Caption: Said Cohen? Who's askin? Someone who is about to make your dreams come true. Why? Are you gonna let me yell at you until you bleed? Caustic. Quick-witted just as Facebook led me to believe. What the heck are you talking about?!?! Nothing. Ready to experience pure joy? I'm ready to attack!!
     
68. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-19 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-19 Pub. Date: 2018-07-19
Image Number: 172984
Caption: Lost for several days on a dusty road in Utah, the café gang turned savage. No feeling was spared. No truth too brutal to tell. But then … Stop … If we're going to die here, let us not be divided. Let us acknowledge the common humanity that binds us and makes us better than other losers who would perish with less dignity. A final peaceful thought. We are superior. To other creatures. And Blackberry users.
     
69. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-06 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-06 Pub. Date: 2018-07-06
Image Number: 172756
Caption: Road tripping to Phoenix to protest Arizona's immigration laws, the gang slept all night while Rudy drove. In the morning, they awoke to make their voices heard! What the heck is going on?!?! This should be the Hooters in Phoenix! I followed the GPS directions exactly. Distracted, he'd entered into the GPS "Hoopers," a tiny town in Northern Utah. Prepare for the usual internecine conflict. To be continued.
     
70. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-01 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-01 Pub. Date: 2018-07-01
Image Number: 172239
Caption: You're in big, big trouble, you old coot. Give me a break. I'm clean. But you won't be. Meaning what? You won't get away with it. You will pay dearly for your eventual infidelities! How dare you! How dare I?! Look! … making it Larry King's seventh divorce and further accusations of cheating on the part of a man well into his sunset years ... How could you? I will not distance myself from CNN. And to think I was good to you, filthbag! Larry, you're killing it for the rest of us.
     
71. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-07-01 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-07-01 Pub. Date: 2018-07-01
Image Number: 172751
Caption: You're in big trouble, you old coot. Give me a break, I'm clean. But you won't be. Meaning what? You won't get away with it. You will pay dearly for your eventual infidelities! How dare you! How dare it! LOOK! Making it Larry King's seventh divorce and further accusations of cheating on the part of a man well into his sunset years. How could you? I will not distance myself from CNN. And to think I was so good to you, filthbag. Larry, you're killing it for the rest of us.
     
72. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-24 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-24 Pub. Date: 2018-06-24
Image Number: 172094
Caption: A word, filthbag. What'd I do? Confess and I'll make it easy on you! Honestly, snookums, I've no idea what you're talking about. I ate the last lemon cookie! That's it? Yeah. I'm sorry. Wait, what'd you mean: that's it? You don’t have something in mind? My ambiguous accusatory voice and glower usually turns up more than that. I'll ramp it up tomorrow, love bug. Okay, snookums. Judge ye not what works for others.
     
73. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-15 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-15 Pub. Date: 2018-06-15
Image Number: 172244
Caption: I got a tip about a huge geological calamity that's about to happen across the bridge. This story could make my site famous. Could you watch my boy while I go cover it? 'Course, bruh. For $4,000. Cool … what? I been reading Trump's Art of the Deal. It say if a brotha want something bad enough, charge him fifty times your usual fee. Are you sure that's in there? I demand to know what page. Ok. How much that information worth to you?
     
74. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-29 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-29 Pub. Date: 2018-05-29
Image Number: 171958
Caption: I did some research. I read the respected New England Journal of Astrophysics, and it looks like you're right … Gamma ray bursts have to come from pretty close by in order to fry all life on earth. So we won't die. Their calculations showed that the worst a gamma ray burst could do is turn us green and make us very, very angry. Might want to doublecheck to make sure you weren't reading their April 1st edition. It's not all bad. They found it may also boost stamina and strength.
     
75. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-06 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-06 Pub. Date: 2018-05-06
Image Number: 170676
Caption: One peppermint shake, two straws. Oh no. We're back together again. In fact, make that just one straw. We'll share it. I don't want anything to separate us ever again. Two. What are you trying to do, sugar-puss, give me the mouth-herpes you caught form that Sheila? I told you, daffodil-bottom, that wasn't mouth-herpes, it was just a sore where I'd accidentally bitten my lip. And I would never have even been with Sheila if you hadn't just ditched me for that hobo. Biff Manly is a sailor who lives in a houseboat. He's not a hobo ... dear. Do you have any drinks that taste like the high seas? Leave me out of this! I see you've got a drink called The Sheila. We'll. Have. That.
     
76. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-05-03 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-05-03 Pub. Date: 2018-05-03
Image Number: 171061
Caption: Ask Sadie is back. You're on, caller. What's your problem? My wife finally answered my emails. She wants me back. She says she's sorry she left me for her personal trainer. She said making mad, passionate love to him has become unfulfilling. She said she's tired of the excitement, tired of his fancy house, tired of the lavish trips around the world, and tired of him not snoring like a jackhammer, like I always do. Let go and move on, you ninny!!! She said she's especially tired of his ability to understand sarcasm.
     
77. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-26 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-26 Pub. Date: 2018-04-26
Image Number: 170878
Caption: What do you mean you want me to vote illegally this November? I'm registered. Yes … but Ernesto isn't. Ernesto Mumumba Chang Yurchenkovitz is an illegal immigrant who tunneled his way across the Atlantic to vote for tax-raising liberal café regulators. Report to the alley at two a.m. Someone who's definitely not me will leave you a big fake mustache, a Yo Soy Ernesto t-shirt, and an ISIS membership card. When you're caught voting, public sentiment will swing our way. You have some never asking me to do this after refusing to let me take a potty break. Stop whining. My inside man at ICE will make sure you're probably not deported.
     
78. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-25 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-25 Pub. Date: 2018-04-25
Image Number: 170877
Caption: Senator Kamala Harris isn't exactly winning over progressives, she's refusing to refuse giant corporate donations. Progressives hate that. She said as long as we have rules that make us disclose the donors, then the voters will know, and so what's the problem? Sound logic. Voting for her anyway doesn't mean we refuse her for refusing to refuse them. I suspect if we accept that she accepts bribes, that just means we're neglecting to inspect our elected. Fine, except I expect you to accept that I take exception to that.
     
79. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-23 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-23 Pub. Date: 2018-04-23
Image Number: 170875
Caption: Boss, I got your memo about the café's new patrons-only bathroom policy. Good. One question: Why's it say this only applies to scared people? You're aware of the recent Starbucks news? Their mistake was they engaged in negative discrimination. My studies show positive discrimination actually boosts customer retention. Now get back out there, and when you hand a patron the potty key, don't for to say this is only for the brave! I've been saying that. But it just makes them afraid to go in there.
     
80. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-18 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-18 Pub. Date: 2018-04-18
Image Number: 170594
Caption: Boss, is the air conditioning broken? It just plummeted to about 30 degrees. That's awful. It was supposed to gradually fall to 30 degrees. Gradual temperature declines boost sales of hot drinks by 17%. But rapid declines make people leave. This can't be legal. Hold on, I'm setting the Ecobee to emergency blast furnace.
     
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