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Rudy Park

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281. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-03-02 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-03-02 Pub. Date: 2014-03-02
Image Number: 107549
Caption: Rudy, do you think you're ready to take on more responsibility here at the café? What do you mean, boss? I'm just making contingency plans. I'd like to know the café's in good hands if something happens to me. Like what? Oh, the usual … the flu, or a car accident, or exhaustion, or I get stuck out of town ... ... Or I go up on a 20-year bid for bribing federal regulators into declaring the cafe an independent nation for tax purposes. ... Hypothetically speaking. Are you sure it's just hypothetical? Why do you ask? Are you wearing a wire? The sovereign of Ferenginar commands you to lift your shirt. I'm not wearing a wire!!!
     
282. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-02-25 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-02-25 Pub. Date: 2014-02-25
Image Number: 108050
Caption: Hey, Randy. It's Rudy. I'm on a date … Hey, you're not driving are you? I'm not the guy you can call to keep you awake while you're driving. Just pull over. No I'm good. I can make it. Just tell me a story or a joke of some … zzZzz. Once upon a time, Randy hung up on you.
     
283. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-02-17 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-02-17 Pub. Date: 2014-02-17
Image Number: 107781
Caption: Sadie, are you watching the Olympics? The Olympics are dead to me. The year was 1980. I had spent 50 years training for my moment in the sun. I'd sacrificed friends, family, wealth. I had become a tenth-level Scrabble Grand Master. To make it onto the team, I mercilessly destroyed every opponent that crossed my path, including one Rosalynn Carter. To this day, gullible people still believe we boycotted the Olympics because of some silly Soviet invasion. Randy, you watching the Olympics?
     
284. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-02-12 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-02-12 Pub. Date: 2014-02-12
Image Number: 107483
Caption: I've decided to take your advice and try something other than tea. What changed your mind? It occurred to me that if I try something you suggested, I may find that I detest it. I may hate it with every fiber of my being. It may even make me feel sick. AND THEN I'LL GET TO BLAME YOU! Always happy to help.
     
285. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-02-03 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-02-03 Pub. Date: 2014-02-03
Image Number: 107184
Caption: Congress is the worst. I didn’t know you were into politics. I'm not. But I heard they only have a 9% approval rating. That means 91% of people hate them. I don’t wanna be left out of the movement, in face, I want to be ahead of the curve. You think I can make "Wishing chicken pox upon then" catch on? Probably.
     
286. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-01-30 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-01-30 Pub. Date: 2014-01-30
Image Number: 106959
Caption: Wanna play Death Kill Mayhem VII on our Androids? You can join my clan and we can march on cities and kill and pillage together. House of Java Cybercafe. Sorry little dude, I switched back to iPhone. iPhone doesn't have that game. That's lame. They should make it a cross-platform. if we could all kill and destroy each other together, then maybe iPhone users and Android users wouldn't hate each other so much. That's a beautiful dream. Or you can stop being a loser and get a real phone.
     
287. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-01-29 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-01-29 Pub. Date: 2014-01-29
Image Number: 106958
Caption: In my day, kid, we couldn't illegally download movies from bittorrent. We had to illegally download movies from something called Limewire. I wish they'd hurry up and make movies load straight to our brains so kids'll be more amazed by my tales of hardship. (Yawn).
     
288. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-01-19 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-01-19 Pub. Date: 2014-01-19
Image Number: 106949
Caption: Which useless activity are you doing on your electronic pacifier right now? My what? Your electronic pacifier. Your soother. Your binky. My iPhone is not a "binky". It's an indispensable tool, essential to keeping the busy, modern life running like a well-oiled machine. You can't stand to experience a single moment devoid of activity. Solitude makes you agitated, lonely, bored or insecure. Anytime you feel bad, you reach for your phone. It's your binky. My Twitter followers agree with me that you're full of it.
     
289. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-01-15 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-01-15 Pub. Date: 2014-01-15
Image Number: 106945
Caption: Amanda Kern. Comics counseling. All I said was, thanks to Sadie, I know what wrong with the Middle East. It's the birthplace of civilization. It's the dysfunctional family home from whence we all came. It's ruled by a stubborn and cranky old know-it-all mother with a superiority complex. She never changes, which is why the kids, once they come of age, got the heck outta there and only come by once in a while to referee her arguments with dad and to make sure they're still in her will. ... And for some reason, that upset her. This means Jihad.
     
290. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2014-01-09 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2014-01-09 Pub. Date: 2014-01-09
Image Number: 106939
Caption: What do you mean I have to restart my feud with Mrs. Cohen? It makes customers anxious. Anxious patrons buy more comfort food and more hot cocoa. So? You may be my boss, but you can't dictate my personal relationships. Did you ever actually read your contract? Oh come on, who reads that stuff?
     
291. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2013-12-28 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2013-12-28 Pub. Date: 2013-12-28
Image Number: 106928
Caption: Sadie, you've got a lot of nerve making light of all the concussions suffered by football players. Stow it, meathead. By the way, I heard Eli Manning got a concussion last season. What? What?! Eli? My honeybunch? He of the NFL's greatest rear?! I won't have it. The league must reform! Awesome. I still have the brain power to tell a provocative lie. Get it together NFL, or face my wrath!
     
292. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2013-12-24 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2013-12-24 Pub. Date: 2013-12-24
Image Number: 106924
Caption: Why are you dressed like a British lawyer? The term is "barrister," but it doesn't surprise me you don't know that. In fact, it helps me make the case I'm here to prove today: That you're a meathead because you suffered concussions playing football. That's ridiculous. Hold on! Let your counsel represent you. I want to be fair. Counsel? Never mind. He seems to have no comment.
     
293. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2013-12-21 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2013-12-21 Pub. Date: 2013-12-21
Image Number: 106921
Caption: Holiday Poem Week. The big finish. Do we have to? No way. Oh brother. It's true we don't always get along and can make one another sear. But we all really do need each other. May y'all this year have a place to belong! And a mighty fine new year.
     
294. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2013-12-08 make 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2013-12-08 Pub. Date: 2013-12-08
Image Number: 106908
Caption: I need a balloon, but they're locked in a cabinet. That's to keep people from making homemade narcotics. I'm not following. Isn't it obvious? When people see balloons, what's the first thing they think of? Kids? Exactly. And that leads to a desire to have kids. Now, when people want to have kids, the first thing they do is try to attract the opposite sex. Which is why our perfume and cologne are also locked in the cabinet, along with the razors and makeup. Now ... when dates go well, they lead to hanky panky, which leads to babies. Which is why diapers are also locked in the cabinet. Now, babies grow into kids. Kids get sick a lot, which leads to people buying cough syrup. Cough syrup has been used to make illegal drugs. Which is why cough syrup is also locked in the cabinet ... We lock all the ingredients of illegal narcotics in the cabinet. Just get the key and open the cabinet, please. CVX. Sorry, we keep the key locked in the cabinet. Cigarettes. Stuff you don't need.
     
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