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The Joke Comic Strips

gathered from over thirty leading newspaper comic strips.

These are available for you to license for books, magazines, newsletters, presentations and websites.
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1. Comic Strip Mike Lester  Mike du Jour 2018-10-01 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Lester
Comic/Cartoon: Mike du Jour
Viewable Date: 2018-10-01 Pub. Date: 2018-10-01
Image Number: 174198
Caption: Knock! Knock! Who's there? A box of ready-to-make meals for the weak. You mean week. You're the guy too lazy to go to the grocery store. Chef Couch Potato.
     
2. Comic Strip Bob Thaves  King Baloo 1990-01-01 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Bob Thaves
Comic/Cartoon: King Baloo
Viewable Date: 2018-09-02 Pub. Date: 1990-01-01
Image Number: 5108
Caption: We're holding a peace conference. Give me two dozen whoopee cushions. NOVELTIES.
     
3. Comic Strip Mike Twohy  That's Life 2003-02-28 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Twohy
Comic/Cartoon: That's Life
Viewable Date: 2018-08-20 Pub. Date: 2003-02-28
Image Number: 3567
Caption: He wasn't kidding--the appetizer is a corn dog!
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-08-01 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-08-01 Pub. Date: 2018-08-01
Image Number: 173259
Caption: Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, You are amazingly funny. What is your secret? -Alexandria. *(Actual reader letter) Ask Sadie at rudy@rudypark.com. Losers. Pardon? Every time I see a whiny, pathetic, technology-addicted jerk, my only possible release is to make a joke at their expense. You hear this one? A Rudy walks into a bar with a bird on his head ... NOT FUNNY! (This cartoon was originally published on 2014-07-09}
     
5. Comic Strip J.C. Duffy  Fusco Brothers 2007-03-19 joke 
Cartoonist(s): J.C. Duffy
Comic/Cartoon: Fusco Brothers
Viewable Date: 2018-07-23 Pub. Date: 2007-03-19
Image Number: 16625
Caption: Is everything a joke to you? No, some things are puns.
     
6. Comic Strip Mike Lester  Mike du Jour 2018-07-06 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Lester
Comic/Cartoon: Mike du Jour
Viewable Date: 2018-07-06 Pub. Date: 2018-07-06
Image Number: 172498
Caption: Today's word o' the day is "bloviate." I give up. What happens when you hear a funny joke with a mouthful of V8.
     
7. Comic Strip Dave Coverly  Speed Bump 2018-06-26 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Dave Coverly
Comic/Cartoon: Speed Bump
Viewable Date: 2018-06-26 Pub. Date: 2018-06-26
Image Number: 172389
Caption: Why?
     
8. Comic Strip J.C. Duffy  Fusco Brothers 2007-03-01 joke 
Cartoonist(s): J.C. Duffy
Comic/Cartoon: Fusco Brothers
Viewable Date: 2018-06-26 Pub. Date: 2007-03-01
Image Number: 16221
Caption: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!! You kill me!!! Just say when.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-06-20 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-06-20 Pub. Date: 2018-06-20
Image Number: 172384
Caption: Periodically, Sadie Cohen gets jacked up on caffeine, then goes to the US post office. Once she gets to the counter, she starts chatting and asks endless questions, stopping up the line for hours, frustrating to no end the people behind her. It's her favorite practical joke and, frankly, one of the darkest things the human eye can witness. Enjoy! What's your opinion of the two-day certified mail to Wichita? Move it, lady!
     
10. Comic Strip Bob Thaves  King Baloo 1990-01-01 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Bob Thaves
Comic/Cartoon: King Baloo
Viewable Date: 2018-05-22 Pub. Date: 1990-01-01
Image Number: 2906
Caption: …and he's the guy who's going to balance the budget?!
     
11. Comic Strip Mike Lester  Mike du Jour 2018-05-08 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Lester
Comic/Cartoon: Mike du Jour
Viewable Date: 2018-05-08 Pub. Date: 2018-05-08
Image Number: 171130
Caption: Cooking segment??? Why do we need a cooking segment? To break up the strip. Here's a list of recent story lines … Skin cancer week, salad bartender week, Pigmies week, Dick the Cat dies week and toupee week. Skin cancer is no joke. Which is why we need a cooking segment. Who wants to chop the squirrel?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-21 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-21 Pub. Date: 2018-04-21
Image Number: 170597
Caption: So what happens when you told Armstrong you wouldn't recite that Sinclair Broadcasting script? Oh, nothing. Sinclair sued me for everything I own, that's all. But the joke's on them: I've set up different LLC's for every aspect of my life. So all they could get were the assets of the LLC that they paid. This opens up a whole world of possibilities. I knew forming Rudy-has-next-to-nada LLC was a good idea. I am going to miss my ten cents and my broken wiffle ball, though.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-18 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-18 Pub. Date: 2018-04-18
Image Number: 170576
Caption: I demand the right to fire Dick Fink, sir. He's incompetent, he's a snake, and I'm pretty sure he's the one who put that family of skunks in my desk. I'm still not sure I buy the skunks, Garcia … which reminds me, did you ever complete that course on personal hygiene? Don't change the subject. Dick Fink wants my job, sir. He's been trying to ruin me ... for year. I'm not imagining this. I know ... I sound paranoid. But that's all part of his secret plan. Take the rest of the day off, Garcia. 2002.
     
14. Comic Strip Mike Lester  Mike du Jour 2018-04-18 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Mike Lester
Comic/Cartoon: Mike du Jour
Viewable Date: 2018-04-18 Pub. Date: 2018-04-18
Image Number: 170582
Caption: Mike goes to the dermatologist …I'm here to have a procedure on my arm. Sign in please. Right-handed, ouch! Ok. That's not funny. Allergic to derm jokes.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-04-16 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-04-16 Pub. Date: 2018-04-16
Image Number: 170574
Caption: 2016. Trump's not going to win. Not worried about him. That's why you should worry about him!!! What do you mean? Every time an impossible candidate wins, it's because people didn't worry about him. No one worried about Nixon. Nixon was a has-been. No one worried about Reagan. Reagan was a joke. Barack Obama ... he was nobody. 2018. No way President Trump can survive all these scandals. Thanks, you've just doomed us all.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-04-07 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-04-07 Pub. Date: 2018-04-07
Image Number: 170209
Caption: How was your date last night, little buddy? I'm not sure. We were having a great time, laughing, joking … when out of nowhere she said that's rude. That's what I asked. She answered you're acting all annoyed all of a sudden. I said Why? She said … You sighed. Please tell me your response was simply I didn't mean anything by it. I helpfully informed her that a sigh is a reflexive bodily function we do subconsciously several times an hour to reinflate the alveoli in our lungs to allow for the transport of oxygen and carbon dioxide. Sigh.
     
17. Comic Strip J.C. Duffy  Fusco Brothers 2018-03-26 joke 
Cartoonist(s): J.C. Duffy
Comic/Cartoon: Fusco Brothers
Viewable Date: 2018-03-26 Pub. Date: 2018-03-26
Image Number: 169726
Caption: Is it legal to substitute a Waitress, there's a fly in my coffee joke for a Waiter, there's a fly in my soup joke? I'm afraid not. Henny Youngman once spent six months in jail for saying, Take my wife. I entreat you.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-03-24 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-03-24 Pub. Date: 2018-03-24
Image Number: 169643
Caption: Ask Sadie Advice Hour, what's your problem?! Could you explain your joke for the other day about the flying squirrel and the great acorn. Nothing doing. Jokes are never funny once they're explained. Please? I'm sure I'll still find it funny. Sigh. Fine ... When I said my ancestor was a flying squirrel who prayed to the great acorn to get rid of the triceratops who were trampling her magnolias, I was implying that that's why the asteroid wiped out the dinosaurs. That's not funny. I will hunt you to the ends of the earth!!!
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Rudy Park 2018-02-14 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Rudy Park
Viewable Date: 2018-02-14 Pub. Date: 2018-02-14
Image Number: 168443
Caption: I just can't anymore. There is no can't, little buddy. We can do anything we set our mints to unless we give up. When you say I can't, what I hear is I won't. Now there are photos of Richard Dreyfuss groping fans behinds and nether regions. Do you think it's too soon to tweet some Close Encounters of the Fourth Kind jokes. You can't.
     
20. Comic Strip Greg Evans  Luann 2018-01-28 joke 
Cartoonist(s): Greg Evans
Comic/Cartoon: Luann
Viewable Date: 2018-01-28 Pub. Date: 2018-01-28
Image Number: 166609
Caption: Remember how we fought when we were kids? Yeah. You were so annoying. Always hogging the bathroom. At least I didn't stink it up. You were such a slob. And you were a pest. Like that time you put Jell-O in my shoes. You stapled my shirts to their hangers! Yeah, but you filled my Oreos with toothpaste! 'Cuz you put glitter in my shampoo bottle You called me a waste of perfectly good carbon. You called me a Cheeto-headed lardbutt. I kinda miss those days, don't you? yeah. Want me to give you a wedgie?
     
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