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Candorville

Comics about Jamses.

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Result page:    2  Next  (28 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-06-13 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-06-13 Pub. Date: 2019-06-13
Image Number: 178023
Caption: I've narrowed down the list of who I want to write the foreword to my next book, Clyde. The ones that made the cut are Slimeball, Slippery James, Puppet Jones, Lamb the Sham, McMuffin, Fat Jerry, Crazy Nancy, Wacky Jacky, Pencil Neck, Mr. Magoo, Dumb as a Rock, and Mr. Peepers. I would've chosen The Dumbest Man on Television, but he was kind of standoffish when we met. Psycho Joe was surprisingly friendly. In other words, you still upset the President ain't nicknamed you.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-28 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-28 Pub. Date: 2019-03-28
Image Number: 176942
Caption: Your article about the electoral college was riddled with inaccuracies. You mean my humor column? The electoral college not a for-profit, fake real estate training program started by James and Ivanka Madison to defraud people out of their life savings. It was a joke. And Hollywood actors and rich CEOs did not bribe people to get their spoiled kids into the electoral college. It was a joke. (Sigh) People always get extra-literal when their worldview is challenged. We're talking about my view of the electoral college, not of the world.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-26 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-26 Pub. Date: 2019-03-26
Image Number: 176940
Caption: Wanna know how I know Star Trek: Discovery is a big deal? How? There are conspiracy theorists on Youtube trying to debunk it. I've seen people debunk the JFK assassination. I've seen them debunk the moon landing. Never in my life have I seen people try to prove that an insidious cabal of tv executives is deceiving fans into thinking a tv show is actually set in the universe they say it's set in. Their hour-long video about how the uniforms are 25 percent different from Captain Kirk's almost lured me in. Dios mio.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-10 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-10 Pub. Date: 2019-03-10
Image Number: 176423
Caption: First they came for Roseanne, and I said nothing because I wasn't a fan of her politics. Dr. Noodle. Then they came for Marvel director James Gunn, and I said nothing because I'm not really into superhero movies. Then, they came for Kevin Hart, and I said nothing because I'm more of a Chappelle fan. Then they came for one of my work friends, and I said nothing because, well ... maybe he brought it on himself. Then, they came for me. Not to self: Delete entire Twitter history ... and nobody said a word in my defense.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-04 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-04 Pub. Date: 2018-12-04
Image Number: 175263
Caption: Why is there only room for one super star in a family, even when they've got a really talented sibling? It's almost like it's a law of physics. There's Michael and then there's Jermaine. There's Beyonce, and then there's Solange. There was Franklin Delano Roosevelt, and then there was James Roosevelt Roosevelt. There was ... Transformers, and then there was Gobots. There were your first few examples, and then there was your last one.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-25 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-25 Pub. Date: 2017-09-25
Image Number: 163097
Caption: Sometimes I feel like I'm wasting my entire life being a journalist. Why bother? History just repeats itself anyway. Dr. Noodle. I just started reading a political memoir I heard about on the radio this morning. M.A. The Democrat James M. Cox wrote it after he lost the election of 1920 to Harding. It's called "That Which Occurred." He also blamed his loss on Bernie Sanders. I hope I can be as sharp as Bernie at his age.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-17 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-17 Pub. Date: 2017-05-17
Image Number: 158078
Caption: I had a dream last night, Clyde. Want to hear about it? Not sure. Last time you told me 'bout one of your dreams, it was some sci-fi nonsense 'bout you travelin' back in time to save Abraham Lincoln. This one wasn't about time travel, it was about how Trump keeps firing everyone who says they have info on his Russia scandal. Well ... ok. Go. A woman named Harbinger traveled through time and across the multiverse to collect a team of awesome journalists who could uncover the truth. Stop.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-16 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-16 Pub. Date: 2017-05-16
Image Number: 158077
Caption: Lemont, we have need of you. What the -- Color-blinded. I am the harbinger, I'm … Here to warn me about a calamity threatening the entire multiverse. DC Comics' "Crisis on Infinite Earths," 1985. Oh … wait … this must be Earth Prime, where heroes only exist ... Heroes only exist as comic book characters or as dreams. Anyway, why are you in my dream? I was due to testify before Congress about President Trump's Russia ties, but Trump fired me. So I have some free time.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-28 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-28 Pub. Date: 2017-02-28
Image Number: 155067
Caption: "James Bond" can't be black. Why not? Black, white, so what? Was he ever black in the books? I don't think they ever even mentioned his ethnicity. All he has to be is smooth, charming, debonair and cunning. What's important is that he's English. And there of plenty of black men in England. There'd be a lot of bigots furious about this. Bonus. It would give me a reason to avoid the internet and have a life again. Dios mio.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-02-27 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-02-27 Pub. Date: 2017-02-27
Image Number: 155066
Caption: Seriously? They never gonna cast a brotha as the next James Bond. I don't see why not. All the actors have been different. Blond, brunette, blue-eyed, brown-eyed, Scottish, Irish, English, Australian … White, white, white, white, white, white, white, white be all I heard.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-02-22 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-02-22 Pub. Date: 2015-02-22
Image Number: 122695
Caption: "Your thigh bone's connected to your hip bone … Your shoulder bone's connected to your neck bone … Your neck bone's connected to your head bone … Now hear the word of the Lord!" James Weldon Johnson wrote that almost 100 years ago. Yeah, well … I still don't see why it's James Weldon Johnson's fault you just had to pay $5,000 to get your teeth fixed. It's obvious, Lemont. For 100 years, they've been indoctrinating us at an early age into not considering teeth to be an integral part of the body. That's what lets health insurance get away with not covering dental. I bet the HMOs paid the guy not to even mention the tooth bone. It's the only explanation for such a glaring omission. First of all, I'm not sure "tooth bone" is a thing ... which is proof that a century of brainwashing works.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-27 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-27 Pub. Date: 2015-01-27
Image Number: 121962
Caption: "James Bond" can't be black. Why not? Black, white, so what? Was he ever black in the books? I don't think they ever even mentioned ethnicity. All he has to be is smooth, charming, debonair and cunning. What's important is that he's English. And there are plenty of black men in England. There'd be a lot of bigots furious about this. Bonus. It would give me a reason to avoid the internet and have a life again. Dios mio.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-26 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-26 Pub. Date: 2015-01-26
Image Number: 121961
Caption: Seriously they gonna cast a brotha as the next James Bond? They might cast Idris Elba. I don't see why not. All the actors have been different. Blond, brunette, blue-eyed, brown-eyed, Scottish, Irish, English, Australian … White, white, white, white, white, white, white, white be all I heard.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-07-23 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-07-23 Pub. Date: 2014-07-23
Image Number: 114098
Caption: I had a dream last night. I dreamt that Israel's Prime Minister was Captain Kirk, of the starship Enterprise. And I dreamt Palestine's leader was also Captain Kirk, of a different Enterprise. Both ships were squaring off in orbit of Cestus III. The Metrons who lived on Cestus got annoyed and beamed both Kirks down to the planet to fight one-on-one. Who won? Not sure. There was lots of shirtlessness and karate chops, and then I woke up.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-11-17 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-11-17 Pub. Date: 2013-11-17
Image Number: 103511
Caption: We've got a little boy due in just a week or so. Dr. Noodle. I think James Henry Washington is a nice, strong, solid name. But Megan said our son has to be named after her favorite uncle. This morning, she said … "Emmett Samuel Nathaniel George Jerry Paul Cartho Washington is a great name." Megan doesn't like to play favorites. Life is largely about playing favorites. Every night we eat chicken-beef-tofu-fish surprise.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-01-20 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-01-20 Pub. Date: 2013-01-20
Image Number: 92314
Caption: You think there'll ever be a short President? I doubt it. The shortest President we ever had was James Madison. He was 5'4". Thug 4 Life. But since the TV age, the shortest one was Truman, at 5'9". Reagan was 6'1". Bush Sr. and Clinton were 6'2". Obama is 6'1". Even W. was inch shy of 6'. I know all this for no particular reason. Thug 4 Life. I'm just good with trivia. Thug 4 Life. Short bruthas always be knowin' exactly how tall e'rebody is. 5'6" AND 3/8THS IS NOT "SHORT"!
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-07-11 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-07-11 Pub. Date: 2009-07-11
Image Number: 35973
Caption: Lemont calls the paper. What do you mean James Olsen's not in? I need to know if he got those Iran protest stories I filed. … What do you mean "elbow strain"? … Yes, I know Michael Jackson died. What's that have to -- Every editorial cartoonist in the country sent drawings of Michael Jackson moonwalking through the pearly gates. Mr. Olsen started shouting "Lazy! Cloying! Aaarggh!" Wha -- you're breakin' up. It sounded like you said "He personally beat them all down with a sock full of quarters."
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2008-10-13 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2008-10-13 Pub. Date: 2008-10-13
Image Number: 27372
Caption: Anderson Cooper's Battle Journal Day 12: Being ferried upriver in a Happy-Time tourist boat. They said it was a good way to gather intel without a lot of attention. And that was ok. I needed the air and the time. Only problem was I wouldn't be alone. So, what's your poison: Kirk, or Spock? Mostly just kids with one foot in the grave.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-11-08 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-11-08 Pub. Date: 2007-11-08
Image Number: 19245
Caption: I'm "Death Eater," auditioning for the role of "Rapper Nemesis." I'll be the Kal-el to your Lex Luthor, the Kirk to your Kahn, The Starbuck to your Baltar. …um, The Green Lantern to your Sinestro? Get outta here, Lemont. How'd you know it was me?
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2007-08-12 James 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2007-08-13 Pub. Date: 2007-08-12
Image Number: 18270
Caption: Senator Obama, do you think the House should impeach the President? I think you reserve impeachment for grave breaches of the president's authority. Thank you, senator. Here the debate the senator, James Madison, founding father and fourth president. Hello, Robert. "If the president is connected in any suspicious manner with any person and there be grounds to believe that he will shelter him, he may be impeached." Mr. Bush has freed a convicted perjurer who may otherwise have testified against his administration. A connection. Mr. Bush has violated the fourth amendment by illegally spying on the public. A subversion. What are you simpering curs waiting for? Bob, James Madison doesn't know what's good for the country.
     
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