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Candorville

Comics about intelligence .

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2020-01-20 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2020-01-20 Pub. Date: 2020-01-20
Image Number: 181364
Caption: In 2003, the White House had spent an entire year cherry-picking intelligence and lying to get their war. After 17 years of continuous war, all it takes to start a war is a president saying believe me. Yeh, but the President changed his mind about It, right? So it's all good. The bar being lowered this much is not all good. you still talking?
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-29 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-29 Pub. Date: 2019-10-29
Image Number: 180103
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? A lot of my readers have turned one me. All because I wrote an article called The New McCarthyism about how Democrats took legit intelligence about Russian interfering in our elections … and went way too far with it. Now, one Democrat will accuse another Democrat of being a Russian bot if that Democrat even mildly critiques a Democrat that Democrat likes. You sound like a Russian bot. That's what my readers said.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-16 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-16 Pub. Date: 2019-10-16
Image Number: 179916
Caption: I counted fifteen punctuation errors on your site in the past five years, Lemont. It's not a huge number, but it's the kind of thing that can damage your Q rating. I propose a 3-phase operation: Hire an editor to prevent future occurrences … Have my people scrub all your past articles to correct every error ... and have a foreign troll farm impugn the intelligence of anyone who's ever pointed out those errors. When's your vacation over? You really need to go back to work.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-14 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-14 Pub. Date: 2019-07-14
Image Number: 178556
Caption: According to Elon Musk, time travel is possible. I can't wait to time-travel. Elon Musk said time travel is possible? Well, not in so many words. He said it's almost a certainty that we're living in a simulation being run by our descendants in the distant future. His reasoning makes sense. In just my lifetime, we went from "Pac-Man" to "The Sims," where Sims live, work, fall in love, have kids ... and in a few decades, the Sims will be artificially intelligent and they'll actually believe they're experiencing all that. If we're artificially intelligent Sims, then anything is possible. What time travel to be possible? Just wait for the Great Programmer to install the "time travel" expansion pack. Want to live forever? Get him to install the "immortality" expansion pack. According to Elon Musk, I'm one expansion pack away from being a billionaire playboy. Nothing doing. the Great Programmer exhausted all his "miracle" expansion packs 2,000 years ago. But he's still got some "delusion" expansions. (This cartoon was originally published on 2016-07-10).
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-12 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-12 Pub. Date: 2019-03-12
Image Number: 176725
Caption: My son asked me what my favorite number is. I thought Who has a favorite number? Then I remembered, I did. When I was a kid, I loved the number eight, because it reminded me of infinity. Nuh-uh, Big L. You tol' me you loved it 'cause it was the only number that reminded you of food. You sure? i remember being a much more profound kid.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-12-10 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-12-10 Pub. Date: 2018-12-10
Image Number: 175375
Caption: Hey! What time's the bus come? Excuse me. You're supposed to say excuse me, not hey. Didn't your parents ever teach you that? Excuse-me-not-hey, what time's the bus come? Are you being smart with me? No. I'm apparently being smart all by myself.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-09-21 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-09-21 Pub. Date: 2018-09-21
Image Number: 174076
Caption: Where've you been all day, Clyde? Ruminatin', bruh. Your boy Socrates said There only one good: Knowledge; an' only one evil: ignorance. An' then my boy John Locke said No man's knowledge here can go beyond his experience. Add them two together an' the sum of that equation be all mankind is evil. You're not supposed to mix philosophers. That's on the warning label.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-27 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-27 Pub. Date: 2018-03-27
Image Number: 169886
Caption: I read your article about how the president shouldn't have chosen a torturer to head the CIA. That's right. She oversaw the torture of Abd Al-Rahim Al-Nashiri, and she ordered the destruction of evidence that we tortured people. That's fake new. We never tortured. We only did enhanced interrogation. You can't change a thing by calling it something else. That's obfuscation. No, it altfact.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-03-22 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-03-22 Pub. Date: 2018-03-22
Image Number: 169629
Caption: I think I may have just witnessed the singularity, Susan. And it's freaking me out. You mean singularity as in black hole? No, I mean as in the moment when artificial intelligence becomes smarter than human beings. Last night, I witnessed what I'm sure were two Russian bots arguing with each other. How do you know they weren't actual people? They politely came to an understanding. We're doomed.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-18 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-18 Pub. Date: 2017-12-18
Image Number: 166283
Caption: What's your IQ, Clyde? Why you wanna know, Big L? If I say my IQ 108, you gonna think what I have to say ain't worth spit? An' if I say my IQ be 152 … what then, you gonna suddenly imbue erethang I say wit' fifteen layers of meaning, an' question what you always thought was out dynamic? I think I'd like to do with the 108. Good call, Big L.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-29 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-29 Pub. Date: 2017-10-29
Image Number: 163801
Caption: Sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one in the office who notices the boss is a moron. Dr Noodle. Well … is he a moron? Certifiably. I even looked up the definition to be sure. A "moron" is defines as "a stupid person." So then I looked up "stupid" just to be sure. It means "having or showing a great lack of intelligence or common sense." I see you've given this a lot of thought. Yeah. Problem is, the last time he displayed his dingbattery I lose my temper and said "moron" out loud. The cretin heard about it. So to cover my behind, I had everyone gather around me and I praised him effusively. I laid it on thick, really buttered him up. Any intelligent person would have seen right through that. But your boss bought it. Instantly! See? Moron! How come no one else at works sees it?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-05 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-05 Pub. Date: 2017-09-05
Image Number: 162343
Caption: Do you know how know there's no god, Rosencrantz? Because we've been abandoned. Will eat for food. I once spun a top, Tyrone. I spun it and I walked away. How it fell, I have no idea. But I know this: An intelligent being spun that top. I thought you said you spun that top. Don't resent me just because I just blew your mind.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-01 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-01 Pub. Date: 2017-05-01
Image Number: 157545
Caption: The Associated Press is fake news. And now we have iron-clad proof. We do? They "interviewed" Trump, but all of his answers were total gibberish. Completely unintelligible. Clearly, their fake-news-generating machine went haywire and just threw together a bunch of random nouns and adverbs. (Sigh) Trump is so going to win in 2020. I'm leading a mob to the AP building to burn the machine at the stake.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-08 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-08 Pub. Date: 2017-04-08
Image Number: 156470
Caption: It's been two years. I still can't believe Jon Stewart quit "The Daily Show." Why not? Ain't you never quit no job? Yes … wait, no. Wait, that's a double negative. Maybe even a triple. I don’t know how to answer that. You open your mouth an let wind come out. For an intelligent dude there an awful lot you ain't be knowin'.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-02 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-02 Pub. Date: 2017-03-02
Image Number: 155069
Caption: This morning, Lionel asked me how they make cereal and I realized … I had no idea. How am I supposed to keep my baby boy from growing up to be a moron if I can't even answer simple questions? Anyway, I found a video about cereal-making on Youtube and showed it to him. The best brad he'll be able to come up with when he's in school is "My dad can google better than your dad."
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-09-17 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-09-17 Pub. Date: 2016-09-17
Image Number: 148484
Caption: 1982. You know how people always say "If aliens existed, why haven't they made contact?" Well … what if they have? What if we aren't the ones they're coming to visit? There are at least six species on earth that have a degree of intelligence. Nobody ever stops to think that the aliens may already have a mutual defense treaty with the octopuses. If you don't want to have sushi, just say "I don't want to have sushi." If the apocalypse happens, I just don't want anyone pointing fingers at me.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-27 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-27 Pub. Date: 2015-11-27
Image Number: 135626
Caption: You know they're working on robots you can have nookie with? Aiight, bruh, that's it. C-Dog puttin' a stop to this train wreck right here. I done put up with your Star Track, an' your Babylon 9, an' your Yoda voicemail greeting, but this spit just got outta control. I'ma go get "Pookie" an' "Big Oatmeal" an' the rest of the boys, an' we gonna have a intervention. I didn't say I was going to buy one, or anything. Go home an' say goodbye to your Doctor Who toothbrush, bruh. Katrina's Ghost.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-11-09 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-11-09 Pub. Date: 2015-11-09
Image Number: 135006
Caption: What's your IQ, Clyde? Why you wanna know, Big L? If I say my IQ 108, you gonna think what I have to say ain't worth spit? An' if I say my IQ be 152 … what then, you gonna suddenly imbue erethang I say wit' fifteen layers of meaning, an' question what you always thought was our dynamic? I think I'd like to go with the 108. Good call, Big L.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-06 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-06 Pub. Date: 2015-10-06
Image Number: 133459
Caption: I met someone in Vancouver, Susan. She's a writer, just like me. After my speech, she approached me to say hello, and I froze. She had this burning intelligence in her eyes. And she was gorgeous. The next day, we went out. One thing led to another, and we ended up getting arrested. Wait ... back up a little ...She had this burning intel ... too far.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-09-29 intelligence 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-09-29 Pub. Date: 2015-09-29
Image Number: 133083
Caption: You realize it's the year 5776 on the Jewish calendar? It doesn't feel like it's 5776. In 5775, we should have already cured all sickness, repaired the environment … defeated the robot uprising, colonized every planet in the constellation Cygnus … and given casinos to all the native life we displaced there. C-Dog don't gamble, bruh.
     
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