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Candorville

Comics about girls.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-09 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-09 Pub. Date: 2019-07-09
Image Number: 178421
Caption: Hey, Big L, wassup? Listen, I can't make it to your barbecue tomorrow. Why not? Whachoomean Why not? What you is, my momma? My girl? My parole officer? I'm a grown man. I don't gotta tell nobody why not nothin'. Even if you don't come, you owe me for your half of the food I bought. See you at noon.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-10 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-10 Pub. Date: 2019-04-10
Image Number: 177115
Caption: Remember Oleg, from junior high? I remember thinking even back then, I hate that guy. He'd run his fingers through girls' hair … rub their necks … kiss them all hello on the lips … I remember you used to say Sitcoms make very special episodes about guys like that. That's how I know anyone saying We didn't know it was wrong back then is full of it. Not everyone watched as much tv as you, Lemont.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-03 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-03 Pub. Date: 2019-02-03
Image Number: 175839
Caption: I read your article where you bashed people who accuse Star Trek Discovery of being a Social Justice Warrior show. You wrote Star Trek has always been a show about social justice. The entire premise of the show was a ship full of people from all walks of life ... flying from planet to planet to enlighten bigots, fascists and all kinds of other (censored). But you're hopelessly biased. Of course you would want people to have a so-called open mind. Your grandmother was a call-girl. Don't bother denying it, I spent all night on Google figuring it out. She was a telephone operator ... That's what they called telephone operators. Your defensiveness means I'm right. That's science.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-16 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-16 Pub. Date: 2019-01-16
Image Number: 175842
Caption: I read your article 'bout how it turned out the @#$% that shot that black girl was black, not white. I read the comments under it. It was almost nothin' but white people gleeful about it. They was so busy rubbing it in your face, they forgot they talkin' 'bout the murder of a precious little girl. I don't think I've ever heard you say gleeful before in my whole entire life ... or precious. @#$% ... Them bigots got me all turned 'round.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-15 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-15 Pub. Date: 2019-01-15
Image Number: 175841
Caption: Hah! You race-baiters got owned! I read your article last week about that little black girl who got shot. How embarrassing for you. When the police said the suspect was a white man in a truck, you all wanted to talk about racism. But it turned out the real shooter was a couple of black guys. Now you're talking about guns and gangs, but not one mention of racism. It's normal to chance your focus when you get new facts. Ha! You flip-flopper. Bet you wish you hadn't made such a big deal out of a little girl getting shot.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-01-14 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-01-14 Pub. Date: 2019-01-14
Image Number: 175840
Caption: What's wrong, Lemont? Jasmine barns, the little black girl who was killed in a shooting. When the police said the suspect was a white man, I was shaken. I was scared. I was afraid it was one more example of racism getting out of control in America. But when the police later said no, the real killer were black ... I felt ... I felt ... relief. That's normal, Lemont. Don't be too hard on yourself. How bad off are we when we can think Oh good, it's just normal gun violence.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-20 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-20 Pub. Date: 2018-05-20
Image Number: 171354
Caption: I feel like I'm starting to hate everyone, doc. Dr. Noodle. I hate the stranger who shook his head in disgust at me when he saw I was in an interracial relationship. I hate the lady who cut me off in traffic and almost ran me off the road this morning. I hate the dentist who convinced me I needed a $350 month guard when I could've bought one just as good for $25 at Target. I hate the Girl Scout who sold me six disgusting boxes of ten-year-old Samoa cookies. That's ... then? I hate myself for not noticing she had to have been at least 23 years old.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-02-24 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-02-24 Pub. Date: 2018-02-24
Image Number: 168665
Caption: Hello, mom, you've reached Lemont Brown. I can't come to the phone right now because I'm out on a date with a girl other than the one you keep trying to set me up with. Please leave a message, and I'll get back to you as soon as she's broken my heart and I'm ready to come to my senses.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-12-31 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-12-31 Pub. Date: 2017-12-31
Image Number: 166075
Caption: Susan told me you finally got a doctor appointment, bruh, 'bout that heart problem you probably got … She also told me your doctor name. Canada or bust! I don't know what you're talking about, Clyde. When we was four, you told the preschool you was allergic to Mrs. Cass so they'd have to transfer you to Mr. Kirk's class. When we was nine, you fell in love with that new girl Lois Lane as soon as you heard Mrs. Drake read her name at roll call. When you know, you just know. In college, you took that advanced kelp studies class 'cause it was taught by a "Professor Xavier." I don't know what you're getting at, I've always been fascinated with aquatic plants. Tell me you ain't choose this cardiologist just 'cause his name "Doctor Hu."
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-21 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-21 Pub. Date: 2017-11-21
Image Number: 165148
Caption: What's the best way to make a girl forget a guy? Pretend you ain't got no sense of humor. If a bertha don't make a woman laugh, she gonna forget about him real quick. If that don't work, change your number, change your name, an' move to another state. No, I meant I want a girl I like to forget about another guy she likes. I gave one piece of advice a day. Come back tomorrow.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-19 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-19 Pub. Date: 2017-11-19
Image Number: 164467
Caption: Great-looking hair, made easy. Just dye. We now return to our program. How much time do I have to save the kitten, bring Timmy his inhaler, and defuse the nuclear bomb? You have a lot less time than you did before you started that sentence. We'll be back after these messages ... I'm rally psyched Little Tyrant Pizza's bringing the flavor with its new pecan guacamole dipping sauce! A guy, a beach, a skateboard. A girl bouncing in slow motion. And these corn chips that have nothing to do with any of that. Buy them. Six other commercials that go on so long that you don't remember what show you're watching. Going back to Netflixing everything. And now back to our show ... What were we doing? Defusing something or other, I think.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-11-18 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-11-18 Pub. Date: 2017-11-18
Image Number: 164875
Caption: What up witcha girl Siri, bruh? What do you mean? I was mindin' my business, watchin' "Gilligan's Island." All of a sudden cops bust down my door an' demand to know what I done to my "little buddy." The rookie cop kept screamin' "Drop the coconut." Oh yeah. I forgot to mention Apple's Siri sometimes calls the police if it thinks the voices from the tv told it to call 911. I ain't even had no coconut.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-01 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-01 Pub. Date: 2017-10-01
Image Number: 162685
Caption: I just finished reading Hillary Clinton's book, "What Had Happened Was … " Sound like a good book, bruh. I thought so. But you know, the real title was supposed to be "What Happened." So I figured I was just seeing things. But then I notices something. Whachoo noticed, Big L? All the other books on my bookshelf had unfamiliar titles too. I noticed my old copy of "1984" was not called "2017." "Deliverance" was not called "They Shoulda Stayed They Butts at Home." the book I thought was called "To Kill a Mockingbird" was not called "Black Man's Tragedy as a Growth Experience for a Little White Girl." Do you happen to have Photoshop, a printer and too much time on your hands? Must be that "Mandela Effect" think you always be talkin' 'bout. Give me back my old bookcovers.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-14 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-14 Pub. Date: 2017-09-14
Image Number: 162600
Caption: I don't want to be that guy, but … But what? Well … you notice anything about all the old sitcoms they're bringing back? "Full House" … "Will & Grace" … "Roseanne" … "Gilmore Girls" … How come nobody's talking about bringing back "227" … "A Different World" ... "Living Single" ... "Family Matters" ... "Moesha" ... "The Cosby Show" ... Stop trying to change the subject and admit you lost that argument we had two weeks ago. Wait, wait ... scratch "The Cosby Show."
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-06 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-06 Pub. Date: 2017-05-06
Image Number: 157550
Caption: That was embarrassin', Lemont. I ain't never seen a brotha get hustled like that before. It's like you got no street training at all. What happened to erethang I taught you, bruh? A whole lifetime of lessons was just straight lost on you. I wanted 20 boxes of Girl Scout cookies. I really did. Keep tellin' yourself that.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-23 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-23 Pub. Date: 2017-03-23
Image Number: 155916
Caption: Whachoo gon' move to Canada for, bruh? So what you got some perfect girl up there. That ain't gonna last. Either she gonna get tired of you, or you gonna get tired of her. Or the magic gonna wear off an' you'll find out she ain't "perfect" noway. Only way to keep a perfect relationship perfect is to end it while it still be perfect. That's why your life full of failure, an' my life be full of perfection. Stop making nonsense seem like sense!
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-15 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-15 Pub. Date: 2017-03-15
Image Number: 155654
Caption: It's not just women who're attracted to "bad boys." Guys are attracted to bad girls, too. Some guys always pass up the women who adore them and end up with women who berate them … or who lie, cheat and forget to mention they have husbands. There's nothing like being emotionally beaten to death to make you feel alive ... er, I assume. I wouldn't really know.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-03-14 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-03-14 Pub. Date: 2017-03-14
Image Number: 155653
Caption: What's with teenage girls running away to join ISIS? Are they crazy? Don't they know how they treat women? Some girls just can't help being drawn to "bad boys." And evil men are the "baddest" around. It's the excitement. It's the danger. It's the thrill of being with someone who could utterly ruin you ... er, I assume. I wouldn't really know.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-25 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-25 Pub. Date: 2017-01-25
Image Number: 153703
Caption: 1982. Last night I looked across the alley and saw your light on, but you weren't answering your tin can. I didn't know you called me. Maybe the string wasn't tight enough to receive the call. But I was busy anyway. I was writing to my pen pal. Chuck's been having trouble working up the courage to talk to some little red-haired girl. He was even too timid to try my suggested "pull her hair" ice-breaker. That's my best move. I don't know why you men think us women like that. Try my can again tonight, I'll try to get better reception.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-01-24 girl 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-01-24 Pub. Date: 2017-01-24
Image Number: 153702
Caption: 1982. What do you want to be when you grow up, Lemont? I want to be a factory worker. Then I could wear overalls and join a union and live in a big house in a small town and win the heart of a pretty girl. Papa says I'm a pretty girl. Yeah, but your dad's not rich and snobby and he'd probably approve of me. Life doesn't have to be like the movies. I just think it'd be cool to be the "boy from the wrong side of the tracks" to someone.
     
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