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Candorville

Comics about emergencies.

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Result page:    2  3  Next  (51 images)


1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-06 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-06 Pub. Date: 2019-11-06
Image Number: 180253
Caption: All children go through a crisis when they first realize their parents aren't perfect. Tell me about it. Dr. Noodle. After Lionel calmed down, I convinced him I wasn't purposely trying to kill the neighbor by selling him a microwave that might cause cancer ... or at least I thought I did. That night, flashing lights and a siren woke me from a deep slumber. I looked out the window and saw the police and the coroner were at the neighbor's apartment. It's a good idea to hide the phone for the duration of the crisis. Scribble scrib- Lionel later told me he'd called anonymously, using the name Daniel Tiger, so I wouldn't get locked up. He's so smart.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-06-09 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-06-09 Pub. Date: 2019-06-09
Image Number: 178019
Caption: The year 2039. Beeeep … Beeeep … Beeeep … This is an alert from the emergency broadcast system. This is not a frill. An oxygen dead zone has been detected in your area. Remain indoors, seal all vents, and activate your dwelling's oxygen tank. If you are outdoors without a personal supply of oxygen, proceed to the nearest shelter. If you are at a shelter but have no oxygen insurance, immediately exit the shelter and hold your breath as long as possible. State Tv now returns you to your program, already in progress ... six of the candidates applying to the Chamber of Commerce to be overseer of North America favor an Oxygen for All system. Thanks because they're socialists. Click.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-11-25 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-11-25 Pub. Date: 2018-11-25
Image Number: 174819
Caption: This is the Hallmark Channel. Tonight on the Andy Griffith Show, little Opie Taylor gets … recruited into the Nazi party, only here on the History Channel. But first, Ancient Aliens … were easily confirmed for lifetime appointments to the federal courts. Fox News reports that most senators ... were totally rubber stamps! ... You've been watching Top Ten Favorite Office Supplies. If you like our content, do all the Youtube things: Like, share, and ... set fire to the Reichstag, giving Hitler an excuse to demand almost-unlimited emergency powers. Despite the evidence, he blamed it on a devious liberal conspiracy to subvert ... Gilligan, Mary Ann, and the Skipper, too.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2018-05-15 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2018-05-15 Pub. Date: 2018-05-15
Image Number: 171502
Caption: So … Clyde and I were playing basketball when all of a sudden four other guys showed up and asked if they could join in. So we started choosing up teams, and all of a sudden I got all nervous and anxious. I'm a grown man. I have a son. A career. But all of a sudden I was right back in second grade hoping I wouldn't be the last to be picked. Is that why Clyde asked me how my emergency vasectomy went? I had to think of some reason to get out of there.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-10-04 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-10-04 Pub. Date: 2017-10-04
Image Number: 163372
Caption: Susan, remember when that hurricane decimated Puerto Rico? Remember how the president immediately sent the Navy, lobbied Congress for an emergency funding bill, made it easy for refugees to reach the mainland, and moved heaven and earth to restore power to the island's hospitals? Wait ... are you being sarcastic? And remember how the media covered it just as much as they did Houston?
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-20 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-20 Pub. Date: 2017-09-20
Image Number: 162850
Caption: All children go through a crisis when they first realize their parents aren't perfect. Tell me about it. Dr. Noodle. After Lionel calmed down, I convinced him I wasn't purposely trying to kill the neighbor by selling him a microwave that might cause cancer ... or at least I thought I did. That night, flashing lights and a siren woke me from a deep slumber. I looked out the window ad say the police and the coroner were at the neighbor's apartment. It's a good idea to hide the phone for the duration of the crisis. Scribble scrib - Lionel later told be he'd called anonymously, using the name "Daniel Tiger," so I wouldn't get locked up. He's so smart.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-09 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-09 Pub. Date: 2017-05-09
Image Number: 157808
Caption: I'm pretty sure my appendix just ruptured. Don't you want to call an ambulance. No, I opted for the silver Obamacare plan. That means if I call an ambulance, I won't be charged thousands of dollars for it. If that happens, I won't be able to keep saying "Obamacare's done nothing for me" with a clear conscience. Now's not the time to think about politics. Spoken just like a -ouch- ... statist.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-05-08 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-05-08 Pub. Date: 2017-05-08
Image Number: 157807
Caption: Do you know why I'm headed to the hospital right now? Um … no … you ok? No, I'm not. I'm headed there to give them this huge check, thanks to Obamacare. I like to deliver it in person, so I can glare at them disapprovingly. The opposition as pretty much completely fallen apart. Also, I think my appendix may have exploded.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-25 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-25 Pub. Date: 2017-04-25
Image Number: 157285
Caption: Susan called 911 on me, Clyde. She was trying to get them to come take me in for a heart attack she thought I was having. But they put her on hold. And after a while, she sort of fell asleep and I sort of snuck away. Whachoomean "sort of," Big L? Ain't no such thing as "sort of." Somethin' either be or be not, bruh. One ambulance ride and one day in the hospital would eat up my whole life savings. Dead people ain't got no life savings, bruh.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-04-14 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-04-14 Pub. Date: 2017-04-14
Image Number: 156722
Caption: I don't see why you're mad at Clyde. 'Cause he said I look like I'm about to have a heart attack. What do you mean? He saw some Youtube video about the warning signs, and now he thinks he's a doctor. Just because I haven't been able to catch my breath all day, my jaw, arm, and back hurt, and my stomach is all in knots ... doesn't mean I'm having a heart attack. you've reached 911. Please hold. It's probably just gas.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-06-19 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-06-19 Pub. Date: 2016-06-19
Image Number: 144283
Caption: Hello, you've reached Dubble Cross Health Insurance. This is Ryan. How may I hinder you? Hi, Ryan. I just got a bill form you for $850. It says it's for "professional services." But I'm not with Dubble Cross. I have Czar Health Insurance. That's right, but it says here you used the emergency room the same week you switched from us to Czar. So when they billed your visit to us, you weren't actually covered by us. So you have to pay us back. What're you taking about? I used the emergency room on the last day of December, and I'd already paid you my dues for December, so I was covered! Our billing cycle ends the day before the last day of the month, sir. Since when, Ryan?! Since we realized people wouldn't know that.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-09 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-09 Pub. Date: 2015-01-09
Image Number: 121080
Caption: I'm pretty sure my appendix just ruptured. Don't you want to call an ambulance? No, I opted for the silver Obamacare plan. That means if I call an ambulance, I won't be charged thousands of dollars for it. If that happens, I won't be able to keep saying "Obamacare's done nothing for me" with a clear conscience. Now's not the time to think about politics. Spoken just like a - ouch - ... statist.
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-11-16 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-11-16 Pub. Date: 2014-11-16
Image Number: 118343
Caption: Let me get this straight: Lately you've been refusing to be intimate with your wife because … Ebola. Dr. Noodle. I just think it's irresponsible to put oneself at risk during this time of national emergency. Ph.D. Do you have any reason to believe she's been exposed to the virus? Well, she's been to an Ebola-infested region. I watched "Dallas" on Netflix. That's not the same thing. We have a 4k TV. It's just like being there. WTH. I think until she's been quarantined for 26 weeks, I should stay in the den by myself and watch football. He can stay in there for 26 years for all I care. That's overkill. Football's only 26 weeks. S.M.H.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-07 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-07 Pub. Date: 2014-09-07
Image Number: 115372
Caption: I taught Lionel how to call 911. WHAT?! What that little two-year-old boy ever done to you, Big L? Huh? Cops be outta control, bruh. If there a emergency an' he call 911, there a 50/50 chance the police'll help … an' a 50/50 chance they gonna knock down the door without a warrant, toss in a flashbang grenade, an' pepper spray your toddler before draggin' his dad out in the hallway half naked. What is you thinkin' Big L? He's be better off if you teach him to call Domino's. Well, they would probably get there faster.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-24 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-24 Pub. Date: 2013-09-24
Image Number: 101943
Caption: You called? Yeah, what's another word for "ventriloquist"? What? Another word for "ventriloquist," I was just wondering. Lemont, they told me at work that you called. You never call, you always text. So I thought it was an emergency and dropped EVERYTHING! Would now be a bad time to ask how your day's going? And why don't you have your phone on you?!?!
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-06-03 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-06-03 Pub. Date: 2013-06-03
Image Number: 97638
Caption: What's going on, Lemont? Wanna see Star Trek Into Darkness? Lemont … You texted me with a "911." I ran out on a date because of that. Please tell me you don’t consider seeing Star Trek to be an emergency. Ok … What would you like me to tell you? NEVER ABUSE THE "911"!
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-05-30 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-05-30 Pub. Date: 2013-05-30
Image Number: 97402
Caption: The guys watch "The Maury Show." I ain't the daddy! Yes you is the daddy! Yes you is the daddy! Yes you is the daddy! No I ain't the daddy! No I ain't the daddy! No I ain't the daddy! Hold on … Let's find out. We have the results of the paternity test. You in trouble now! Brian, in the case of Linda's baby, Little Brian Jr, you are. BEEEEEEP! This is the Emergency Broadcast System. We interrupt this program to say "Are you really watching this #$%?"
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-07-01 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-07-01 Pub. Date: 2010-07-01
Image Number: 49073
Caption: Loafer? It's your sister. Little Billy's crying. What did you say to him? That I'm chained in a crazy woman's basement and I think she's about to kill me. Call 911!!! Why don't YOU call 911? 'Cause I never programmed it into voice-dial, and my hands are sorta busy. Calling Sissy. You really should have thought to program 911 into voice-dial. CALL 911!!!
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-06-30 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-06-30 Pub. Date: 2010-06-30
Image Number: 49072
Caption: Hello, Billy? This is your uncle. Listen, I don't want to scare you, but … … I tried to deliver a subpoena to Lemont Brown's fiancée, and she chained me up in the basement! Do you want me to call 911? YES!!! … and also can you record "Project Runway"? I forgot to set the DVR.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-03-05 emergency 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-03-05 Pub. Date: 2010-03-05
Image Number: 44614
Caption: Mister, you're right. Facebook takes too long. Gag … choke … I'll find 911 on Twitter, "follow" them and wait for them to "follow" me back. Then I can post a tweet. And they'll see it and be here in no time. JUST … CALL … THEM!!! Just WHAT them?
     
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