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Candorville

Comics about conservatives.

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-19 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-19 Pub. Date: 2019-03-19
Image Number: 176836
Caption: I'm tired of being an alt-right internet superstar. It's way too much work now that I've got 48,000 subscribers to my Youtube channel. Since when do you have 48,000 subscribers? Since my debut video detailed how indigenous people from Foreignvania faked the moon landing by using teddy bears and special effects. I developed a unique following that's part racist, part conspiracy-enthusiast, part Photoshop user, and part Care Bear fanatic. Yeah ... I'm tired just listening to that. It's getting tough to craft stories that keep them ALL entertained.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-18 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-18 Pub. Date: 2019-03-18
Image Number: 176835
Caption: I'm thinking of becoming a radical alt-right internet sensation. Ok, that's it. You can't just go along with every new trend there is. Some people are painters. Some are musicians. Some compose symphonies. My innate talent is sensing incoming trend waves and surfing their peaks and troughs as with the grace of a dolphin. Being a lemming is not a talent, little buddy. And I'm not sure dolphins "surf." Hold on ... trend wave incoming! It involves ... corduroy ... No, wait ... pancakes.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-16 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-16 Pub. Date: 2019-03-16
Image Number: 176729
Caption: Did you see Trump's speech at CPAC last week? Nah, bruh. You catch the Cornel West vs. Diamond and Silk debate on reparations? Where was that? Youtube? Cable news? Twitch? Facebook? Instagram? Periscope? Vimeo? Streamshark? Ustream? Netflix? Broadcast tv. Oh. No, I'm still trying to figure out how to stream that.
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2017-09-03 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2017-09-03 Pub. Date: 2017-09-03
Image Number: 161589
Caption: If Democrats know what's good for them, they'll move further right. That's how they can win elections. All my conservative friends agree. And we tell that to every Democrat we see every chance we get. That's very considerate of you, to help out the opposition like that. Oh, I've always been considerate. When I was a small child, I used to let other kids copy my test answers before I changed them to the right ones. Wait ... what was that? What was what? You said you let kids copy your wrong answers before you changed them to the right answers. Did I? I don't think so. You did. It's exactly what you just said you did. If you know what's good for you, you'll just passively accept what others say without thinking too much about it. Let me guess: Your class was graded on a curve?
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-12-29 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-12-29 Pub. Date: 2016-12-29
Image Number: 152627
Caption: I think the main lesson from this election is, liberal elites should stop looking down on people who think minorities are taking their country. Liberals should be more sensitive to the feelings of those who just worry about their jobs, and about how they can tell jokes about gays and the blacks anymore without being called a bigot. That is clearly the main lesson. Maybe the main lesson is Democrats should nominate someone people like. The other lesson for liberals is they should be conservatives.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2016-08-13 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2016-08-13 Pub. Date: 2016-08-13
Image Number: 147070
Caption: Do you have any children? Yeah, a son. He's almost two. Almost three. I like children. There's an old saying: "If you are not a liberal at twenty, you have no heart and if you are not a conservative at thirty, you have no brain." But that saying ignores that it's the very little kids who actually have it right. Anything they can grasp is theirs, and your rules mean nothing to them. I don't want to have this conversation. If you're not libertarian at two, you have no guts.
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-10-22 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-10-22 Pub. Date: 2015-10-22
Image Number: 133801
Caption: I'm tired of liberals using every mass shooting as an excuse to talk about having more gun regulations. Cars kill far more people than guns! Booze kills more people than guns! Tobacco kills more people than guns! Medical malpractice kills a lot more people than guns! You know that's why we regulate the heck out of all those things, right? I don't wee what that has to do with anything.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-03 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-03 Pub. Date: 2014-10-03
Image Number: 117060
Caption: … Because when libs talk "equal opportunity," they really mean "give me stuff I didn't earn." If you can't afford something, don't expect government to give it to you. If you didn't work hard enough to afford it, you just can't have it. Freeloaders. No, I asked why you're in favor of vouchers for private schools. Oh. 'Cause poor kids deserve private school too. (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-06-02).
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-06-23 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-06-23 Pub. Date: 2014-06-23
Image Number: 112911
Caption: Ever since Newton, we've averaged one school shooting per week. So? Do you know how many kids perish in other ways every week? You don’t see liberals talking about banning cars, light sockets, household cleaners, medicines, fire, swimming pools or flossing. Flossing? Some kids just don't know when to quit.
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-06-22 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-06-22 Pub. Date: 2014-06-22
Image Number: 112229
Caption: This veterans affairs scandal … Great, he's found another excuse to bash the President. This is everyone's fault. If we put so much effort into our wars, we should put at least that much effort into taking care of the people who fight them. I … … I completely agree. Can you believe that? I actually agree with you about something. What's wrong with me? STOP THAT!
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-05-18 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-05-18 Pub. Date: 2014-05-18
Image Number: 110848
Caption: I got so burned the other week when I grabbed my Massacreforce 7 Sr-25 carbine sniper rifle and rushed to support that Cliven Bundy guy. I had no idea he'd turn out to be a big old racist who'd say that "negroes" are lazy, idle porch-sitter who were better off as slaves than they are receiving public assistance. What a fool! What an idiot! We should've used the official code words! You don't say "negroes," you say "inner city." You don't say blacks are lazy parasites who should learn to pick cotton again, you say "the inner city has an 'entitlement culture.'" It's much easier to pretend racism is over when racists aren't so indelicate about it.
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-04-08 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-04-08 Pub. Date: 2014-04-08
Image Number: 109840
Caption: Daddy, why don’t you cawe about me? What? When you thend me to day cawe, you let them give me govewment thubthidited lunches. "Government subsidized lunches"? Yeth. It dethtwoyth my thole. "Destroys your soul"? You're not allowed to watch Republican senators on YouTube anymore. Why you wanna dethtwoy my thole, daddy?
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-04-06 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-04-06 Pub. Date: 2014-04-06
Image Number: 109064
Caption: You know why the conservatives in the senate killed President Obama's "Debo Adegbile" nomination, right? Lennox. Flatbush. Rollo's Cuts. They said it was 'cause Adegbile represented a "cop-killer" in court. Other people say it's because he's got a record of fighting those voter ID laws, an' Republicans don't want someone in the Justice Department who's good at fighting their voter ID laws. But they're all wrong. You wanna know the REAL reason they killed that nomination? ... Because they could. That still doesn't explain why you shaved an ad for your shop onto the back of my head.
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-02-22 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-02-22 Pub. Date: 2014-02-22
Image Number: 107711
Caption: Do you have any children? Yeah, a son. He's almost three. I like children. There's an old saying: "If you are not a liberal at twenty, you have no heart and if you are not a conservative at thirty, you have no brain." But that saying ignores that it's the very little kids who actually have it right. Anything they can grasp is THEIRS, and your rules mean nothing to them. I don't want to have this conversation. If you're not a libertarian at two, you have no guts.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-01-21 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-01-21 Pub. Date: 2014-01-21
Image Number: 106499
Caption: Months ago … I'm going to be running for President in 2016. I'll be running on my ability to work with Democrats. Problem is, the conservatives I'll need don’t trust me BECAUSE of that ability. C-Dog's Incredibly Bad Advice $2. Here's what you do: do somethin' REAL bad. Then the media'll be ALL OVER you. Only thing conservatives hate more than Democrats is the media. That's so crazy it just might work. Start by trappin' some kids on a school bus.
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-08 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-08 Pub. Date: 2013-10-08
Image Number: 102497
Caption: I'm tired of people blaming republicans for the government shutdown. It's both sides' fault. I mean, libs refused to negotiate Obamacare. They insisted it was a done deal. Thank God For Culture Clash. SINCE WHEN has something been "done" just because it was passed by both houses of congress, signed into law by the president, and upheld by the Supreme Court? Since 1787. You're not supposed to answer hypothetical questions.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-04 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-04 Pub. Date: 2013-10-04
Image Number: 102219
Caption: Republicans think Obamacare is socialism. More and more polls show people disapprove of Obamacare. Mainstream Media. Thank God For Culture Clash. … Although a significant number disapprove because it's not socialist enough. MSM. What was that? REPUBLICANS HATE OBAMACARE! LIBERALS AGREE WITH THEM!
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-23 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-23 Pub. Date: 2013-09-23
Image Number: 101942
Caption: To solve gun violence, we need to stop people from buying violent video games. That'd violate the first amendment. The 1st amendment is sacred. What we need to do is pass strict gun laws, we don’t need all these guns. That'd violate the second amendment. The 2nd amendment is sacred. What we need to do is prevent mentally unstable people from buying guns. I can agree on that. Good thing Obamacare covers mental health. Hey ... We actually agree on something. I disagree.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-08 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-08 Pub. Date: 2013-09-08
Image Number: 100807
Caption: I'm tired of people playing the race card every time a state restricts voting rights. Take North Carolina, for instance. I mean, sure, the head of Pasquotank County's Republican Party says he plans to challenge the voter registration of students at a historically black college. I don't see how that's racial. You don't? News-Weak. No, in fact, it's the people who NOTICED that most of the students at the black college are black ... They're the racists. You nose is bleeding. What are you talking about? I don't see any nose except yours. Maybe it's yours. Maybe it's YOURS that's bleeding. Hello, 911? ... Yes, I'll hold.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-09-07 conservative 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-09-07 Pub. Date: 2013-09-07
Image Number: 101092
Caption: Obama's a war criminal. All the bombings and the drones and such … It didn’t bother you when Bush's wars killed a lot more people. Obama's a tyrant. All the spying and the prosecuting leakers and such … All Bush's snooping didn’t bother you one bit. Obama's lazy. He's always on vacation and golfing and such ... Bush took far more vacations. Didn't bother you at all, I recall. I suppose you're implying I only care now because Obama's black. That makes you a racist. Oh man, not the "race card" card.
     
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