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Candorville

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1. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-23 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-23 Pub. Date: 2019-11-23
Image Number: 180469
Caption: I think the age of civility is over, Tyrone. That's because you're totally biased. Very dishonest. A lightweight. Sad!!! Spare change? Will work 4 food.
     
2. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-17 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-17 Pub. Date: 2019-11-17
Image Number: 180297
Caption: … So I told him, Tolstoy once wrote: Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself. But he just looked at me funny and then handed me the diaper anyway. Told you inspirational quotes ain't potty-trainin' nobody.
     
3. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-11-13 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-11-13 Pub. Date: 2019-11-13
Image Number: 180300
Caption: 1982. When I grow up, I want to write Roots 2, where we find out it was all just a dream. Kunta Kinte's dream? No, Chad Cunningham's dream. He's a white slave in a society run by black slave owners, in a world colonized by Africans instead of Europeans. Now do Wizard of Oz. A munchkin finds himself in Kansas, being chased by an angry sheriff ...
     
4. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-19 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-19 Pub. Date: 2019-10-19
Image Number: 179919
Caption: A country this polarized is destined for civil war, don't you think? Spare change? Will work 4 food. Of course not! You're not just ignorant and reckless for saying that … you're evil! Something should be done about people like you.
     
5. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-18 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-18 Pub. Date: 2019-10-18
Image Number: 179918
Caption: What do you mean We should never try to contact aliens? You used to be all for that sort of thing. Yeah, but … you know that UFO the Pentagon admitted was spotted by the USS Nimitz? The one that darted off at unimaginable speeds and angles when our jets tried to intercept it? Joe Rogan interviewed the pilot. One of the viewers in the comments wrote This is exactly how a cat would describe the red dot. You can't let some random internet guy's post change your whole worldview, Lemont. Mister Fusion seems very wise.
     
6. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-10-12 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-10-12 Pub. Date: 2019-10-12
Image Number: 179809
Caption: I told you we should start accepting Paypal. Spare change? Spare™ change?
     
7. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-28 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-28 Pub. Date: 2019-09-28
Image Number: 179622
Caption: I don't want to be that guy, but … But what? Well … you notice anything about all the old tv shows they're bringing back? The Fugitive, Battlestar Gallactica, Punky Brewster, 90210 … How come nobody's talking about bringing back 227 … A Different World ... Living Single ... Family Matters ... Moesha ... Stop trying to change the subject and admit you lost that argument we had two weeks ago. Never mind. I have no problem being that guy.
     
8. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-18 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-18 Pub. Date: 2019-09-18
Image Number: 179500
Caption: Mr. Fitzhugh, I'm not happy about the change you made to my Slim-Swift ad. It's deceptive. Nonsense. Yayle. CEO of the Year 2002. Slim-Swift has not been proven to cause any weight loss at all. And? You write Lose ten pounds in five seconds. Cash is surprisingly heavy, Garcia.
     
9. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-12 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-12 Pub. Date: 2019-09-12
Image Number: 179397
Caption: I'm tellin' you, Big L, it's a exciting time to be alive. Kids in cages … Right wing demagogues subverting democracies all over the world … mass shootings … climate change … No, Clyde, I don't see what's so exciting about these times. Eddie Murphy comin' all the way back, bruh. Cages, Clyde. Cages!
     
10. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-09-07 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-09-07 Pub. Date: 2019-09-07
Image Number: 179299
Caption: You know the Amazon produces a lot of oxygen, and now it's burning up? So? This a good thing, bruh. Amazon rainforest makes oxygen. People breathe it in. Know what they breath out? Carbon dioxide. Carbon dioxide be causing global warming. By transitive logic, the Amazon rainforest be causin' global warming. That's ... look, for one thing, the Amazon soaks up carbon dioxide. Tell it to make up its mind.
     
11. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-17 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-17 Pub. Date: 2019-08-17
Image Number: 178999
Caption: Garcia, if you need birth-control pills for some medical reason, just tell us and maybe we'll change our minds about including it in your health insurance plan. Seriously? Of course. Tell us exactly what's going on with your lady parts, and then we'll make our decision. Pharmacy. Do you take Massacard?
     
12. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-08-13 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-08-13 Pub. Date: 2019-08-13
Image Number: 178995
Caption: Sir, why did you change my health insurance to a plan that doesn't cover contraceptives? President Trump issues a ruling allowing employers to refuse to cover any procedures that we disagree with either religiously or morally. And you have a moral objection to women controlling their own bodies? I have a moral objection to not saving a few bucks a month. Yayle. CEO of the year 2002.,
     
13. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-07-10 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-07-10 Pub. Date: 2019-07-10
Image Number: 178422
Caption: Tyrone, have you ever seen a UFO? I believe I just witnessed one ascending into the heavens. That was no UFO. It was a gigantic ball of fire and hot dogs exploding from a barbecue pit on the fire escape of that building across the way. Most astounding sightings have mundane explanations, Rosencrantz. I challenge your understanding of the word mundane. Ironically, mundane is an interesting word. Spare change?
     
14. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-09 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-09 Pub. Date: 2019-05-09
Image Number: 177531
Caption: Do you understand now why I never want to have kids, Lemont? You hate kids. No, I love them. And I don't want them living in a world where they have to be taught what to do in case of an active shooter. It's not the world, Susan. It's America. You could move to lots of places where school shootings don't happen. Well ... can I move to someplace that won't be affected by climate change? It's ok to admit you just don't like kids.
     
15. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-05-04 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-05-04 Pub. Date: 2019-05-04
Image Number: 177388
Caption: Where you been last couple days, Big L? The Star Trek Discovery season finale was incredible. It made me really want a Captain Pike spin-off. So naturally, I've been in every discussion forum and all over social media trying to motivate everyone on earth to sign the CBS, give us a pre-TOS Star Trek series w/ Captain Pike. Struggle is pointless. petition on Change.org. Naturally don't meant what you think it mean. How do you say please in Hindi?
     
16. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-14 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-14 Pub. Date: 2019-04-14
Image Number: 177112
Caption: I'm only 5,000 donors short. What? What're you talking about, Clyde? Did you know the Democratic party changed they debate rules, bruh? All a brother need is to be at 1% in the polls, have 65,000 unique donors, an' 200 unique donors per state from at least 20 states. An' did you know there ain't no law at all against changin' your legal name to Bernie Sanderz and settin' up a donate to Bernie Sanderz website? Also, ain't no law against sayin' Buy my new album on iTunes in answer to ever debate question. I've got a strange feeling of deja vu about this. Don't worry. I'm sure I won't actually win.
     
17. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-04-06 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-04-06 Pub. Date: 2019-04-06
Image Number: 177047
Caption: My baby boys' really into trains. So I bought a train bed, hand-painted in the colors of his favorite steam train. I ordered a handmade train quilt for it and got him train conductor pajamas. By the time it all arrived, he was really into monster trucks. So I sent it all back and ordered a bunch of airplane stuff. Wait - you did what? I'm getting ahead of the curve. He's not going to fool me again.
     
18. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-03-09 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-03-09 Pub. Date: 2019-03-09
Image Number: 176629
Caption: I've been reporting on people for half my life, now, Clyde. You mean snitchin'. What're you talking about? It's totally different. You ain't tellin' on people? Only thing people hate more than the kid who steal a cookie is the tattletale that come runnin' an' smilin' to tell on him. What did you do? Don't change the subject.
     
19. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-28 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-28 Pub. Date: 2019-02-28
Image Number: 176500
Caption: Is your boy still worried red meat will kill you? No. Apparently I changed the subject. He asked me Daddy, what is red meat? So I said Usually it's a cow. He said A cowy? Why do you want to eat a cowy? A cowy doesn't want you to eat her! So instead of worrying that meat will kill me, now he's worrying that I'm going to eat all the animals. This is why I only eat with grownups. He tore up our zoo pass.
     
20. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2019-02-10 change 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2019-02-10 Pub. Date: 2019-02-10
Image Number: 175946
Caption: Dear Journalist, I read your article about how a bunch of studies show it's certain man is causing climate change, and that that's horrible. And just the next day, I read your article about all the ways we can terraform Mars. YOU'RE SUCH A HYPOCRITE. If man-made climate change it ok on Mars, why isn't it ok here on Earth? Huh? don't even bother replying, I will not read it. Dear Reader, I know you're reading this. Wrong. Tap tap tap tap tap tap tap.
     
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