121. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2008-03-02 |
Pub. Date: |
2008-03-02 |
Image Number: |
22125 |
Caption: |
I'm tired of people complaining about how young people don't turn out to vote. Young people have better things to think about than who's going to have the power to send them to war. I, for one, salute the apathy of our youth. For without apathy, horrible things might happen. Our leaders might not be willing to lie us into wars for our kids to fight, or to rack up huge debts for our kids to pay off. How awful. The whole system would break down! |
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122. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-11-30 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-11-30 |
Image Number: |
19719 |
Caption: |
BREAKING NEWS! There's been no news coverage today of Britney Spears, Lindsay Lohan or Paris Hilton. Let's discuss this ASTOUNDING turn of events with our senior bimbologist, Brandon Blount. Wolf, this was totally unexpected. |
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123. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-09-14 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-09-14 |
Image Number: |
18530 |
Caption: |
I don't know if I can marry you, Lemont. Huh? You were seen with a gay-bashing Republican senator yesterday. Everyone knows gay-bashing Congressmen keep turning out to be gay themselves. Are you gay? Yo! This is your chance to get out of marrying a woman you hate! What he said, fool! |
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124. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-07-05 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-07-05 |
Image Number: |
17826 |
Caption: |
Mr. Cheney, why do you say the Vice President's not part of the Executive Branch? Because the VP casts tie-breaking votes in the Senate. But the Constitution talks about the VP in Article 2, the EXECUTIVE BRANCH article. That doesn't mean anything. Your office is in the White House. How'd you like to be left behind, @#$%. |
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125. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-05-22 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-07-01 |
Image Number: |
14161 |
Caption: |
Dear Lemont Brown, On your blog, you said most Americans buy yellow "Support Our Troops" car magnets 'cause we feel guilty about not sacrificing for the war, guilty about getting tax breaks while our troops are giving their all. You said " magnets won't ruin the finish of your BMW." That's complete nonsense! I removed my magnet today and notices my BMW is missing paint where the magnet used to be! My bad. I guess have sacrificed for the war. Tap tap tap tap. |
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126. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-03-16 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-03-16 |
Image Number: |
16395 |
Caption: |
I couldn't find anyone who would help me hack into Susan's Netflix account to keep her from renting "Clerks" and finding out I stole a line from it. Nobody wanted to get their hands dirty. I had no other choice. You told her the truth? I hired an illegal. Erledigt, gib mir die kohle. |
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127. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-03-15 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-03-15 |
Image Number: |
16394 |
Caption: |
The Candorville Chronicle I know what you're going through. One time I repeated a clever line from a movie… …and my friend thought I came up with it. Tech Support So I thought: do I tell her and risk her being disappointed in me, or do I let my friend believe a lie? Are you gonna tell me how to hack into some-body's Netflix account to make sure she can never rent "Clerks" or not? Telling the truth was embarrassing, but-- Thanks for nothing, Hank. |
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128. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2007-01-17 |
Pub. Date: |
2007-01-17 |
Image Number: |
15841 |
Caption: |
Breaking News: The President is missing! White House sources say all that was found was a scribbled note complaining of "wrist pain" … pain caused by issuing several hundred 'signing statements" contradicting the meaning of he laws they're attached to. Here to discuss the matter, tunnel expert Khan Tryte. Repetitive stress injuries can sometimes lead to nervous breakdowns, Wolf. |
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129. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-09-13 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-09-13 |
Image Number: |
14656 |
Caption: |
Clyde doesn't want to hang out with you anymore? Guess not, Susan. Can you believe that? A no-good worthless thug who can't keep a job just dumped me. A disappointing waste of Adidas and gold teeth just kicked me, Lemont Brown, to the curb. I can't imagine why he wouldn't want to hang out with you. That's what I'm saying. |
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130. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-08-18 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-08-18 |
Image Number: |
14437 |
Caption: |
What do you see when you look at that cloud, Susan? I see a giraffe. What do you see, Lemont? A snake. Hundreds of snakes trying to pass a "minimum wage raise"… …that would actually cut the pay of workers who get regular tips while giving huge tax breaks to the filthy rich. ...Also, a giraffe. |
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131. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-05-17 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-05-17 |
Image Number: |
13748 |
Caption: |
Wait, Nadine, you're not mad at me for fathering the love child of a crazy women and deciding to marry her? Nah, we can work this out. Everyone makes mistakes, honey, but it we care about each other, we can forgive each other. For instance, a cute pizza delivery guy mistakenly showed up at my door last night, and ... I don't think I like where this is going. |
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132. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-05-16 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-05-15 |
Image Number: |
13725 |
Caption: |
Nadine, we've been out on a few dates and I like you a lot, but … Oh, I don't know how to say this… You can tell me anything, Lemont. Nadine … I had a Fonzie t-shirt I was crazy about when I was a kid, but I got sick on it and Momma had to throw it away. You need to work on your rap. Don't you see, you're like my Fonzie shirt. |
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133. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-05-16 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-05-16 |
Image Number: |
13726 |
Caption: |
Huh? What? Why? Everything's going great, Lemont. I dig you, I know you're into me. So what's the problem? I recently found out I fathered the love child of a crazy vegetarian chick, and now I have to marry her. Say what? … And I'm not too fond of your taste in music. |
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134. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-05-09 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-05-07 |
Image Number: |
13667 |
Caption: |
At least 11 million undocumented immigrants live in the United States, in violation of the law. Horrible! They should all be rounded up and deported. They're breaking the law, and no society can survive if people don't respect the law. It's not that big a deal. President Bush authorized spying on Americans without having to get a warrant, in violation of the law. Horrible! Hw should be impeached. He's breaking the law, and no society can survive if people don't respect the law. It's not that big a deal. Thank God for culture clash. |
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135. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-03-29 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-03-27 |
Image Number: |
13327 |
Caption: |
Yo, L, I'm feeling overworked an' everything. Run down. Ragged. You feel me? I'm thinking of taking a six-month sabbatical, Dawg. Y'know, to recharge my batteries. Refill the well. Clyde, you don't have a job. That's beside the point. |
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136. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2006-01-18 |
Pub. Date: |
2006-01-14 |
Image Number: |
12759 |
Caption: |
The White House today admitted they have been spying on the dreams of American citizens. It's irresponsible and inappropriate to suggest there was wrongdoing. The President has not broken any laws asterisk. "Asterisk"? *Technically there is a difference between breaking a law and circumventing it. That's all. Thank you. |
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137. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2005-12-19 |
Pub. Date: |
2005-12-15 |
Image Number: |
12487 |
Caption: |
Breaking news! Air Force One's cargo bay door has malfunctioned, decompressing in mid-air. The President who was secluded himself in a large plastic bubble to avoid hearing bad news, was accidentally jettisoned at 30,000 feet with the luggage. Authorities have temporarily lost track of Bush's bubble. |
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138. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2005-08-08 |
Pub. Date: |
2005-08-08 |
Image Number: |
11188 |
Caption: |
2003. If anyone in my administration was involved with leaking a CIA officer's name to the press, they'll be fired. 2005. …. |
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139. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2005-06-18 |
Pub. Date: |
2005-06-18 |
Image Number: |
10752 |
Caption: |
Lemont awakens in an alternate universe where Nixon and "Deep Throat" existed in 2005, not 1973. I'm Jon Stewart. Today's guest is "Deep Throat."…. |
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140. |
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Cartoonist(s): |
Darrin Bell |
Comic/Cartoon: |
Candorville |
Viewable Date: |
2005-06-13 |
Pub. Date: |
2005-06-10 |
Image Number: |
10676 |
Caption: |
Tonight's top story. Security had to break up a fistfight between Reverend Al Sharpton and Mexican President Vicente Fox….. |
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