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21. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-07-15 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-07-15 Pub. Date: 2015-07-15
Image Number: 129546
Caption: Well, we'd better get going, Rosencrantz. Where is there to go, Tyrone? Don't be so hostile. What? I wasn't being hostile. I said your name simply to alert you that our conversation had begun. The only reason to insert a person's name mid-conversation is to express hostility. I'm sorry, Tyrone. That's it. We're through, Rosencrantz.
     
22. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2015-01-16 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2015-01-16 Pub. Date: 2015-01-16
Image Number: 121388
Caption: Lemont Brown's "Writer's Credo" page 12. #47: This, I believe: NOTHING ENDS. Every "ending" - even DEATH - is the starting point for an infinite number of stories. #48: This, I believe: The studio that rejected my screenplay for "Casablanca 2" is an idiot.
     
23. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-10-24 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-10-24 Pub. Date: 2014-10-24
Image Number: 117918
Caption: You know what made World War II "great" aside from "good" and "evil" being clearly defined? It ended. It was like a novel with a shocking beginning, a perilous middle and a climactic, definitive ending. Today's war's like a tired soap opera the network keeps on the air as long as it's earning them money.
     
24. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2014-09-30 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2014-09-30 Pub. Date: 2014-09-30
Image Number: 117057
Caption: Do you remember the first thing that happened today? I woke up. I suppose that the first thing that happened today. Like the day only starts when you wake up. Narcissist. Shhhh. I'm trying to end the day. Spare change? (This cartoon was originally published on 2012-05-30).
     
25. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-10-24 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-10-24 Pub. Date: 2013-10-24
Image Number: 102929
Caption: I showed him plenty of "Munsters" in the beginning of our relationship. Why can't he be happy with the memory? Why's he still need it all the time? Lemont? Can you at least acknowledge the validity of its point? Sooner or later, each of us finds out favorite show is no longer in our programming package. I say whatever it takes to get me, that's what it takes to keep me. Yeah right, you wouldn't know what to do without me.
     
26. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-07-24 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-07-24 Pub. Date: 2013-07-24
Image Number: 99561
Caption: Well, we'd better get going, Rosencrantz. Were is there to go, Tyrone? Don’t be so hostile. What? I wasn’t being hostile. I said your name simply to alert you that our conversation had begun. The only reason to insert a person's name mid-conversation is to express hostility. I'm sorry, Tyrone. That's it. We're through, Rosencrantz.
     
27. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2013-04-23 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2013-04-23 Pub. Date: 2013-04-23
Image Number: 96079
Caption: What happened in Bothton? Well, ok … I'll start from the beginning … In 8,000 B.C., The last glaciers from the great ice age melted, and a small peninsula began to emerge … No, I mean what happened latht week? Thomebody thed thewwath a boom. Patience. We'll get to that in about eight years. Now, once the land defrosted, Native Americans moved in ...
     
28. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-12-13 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-12-13 Pub. Date: 2012-12-13
Image Number: 90869
Caption: Wait … Back up. Your memoir is about WHAT? How I accidentally caused the end of the world. You have to read from the beginning. If I tell you out of context, it'll sound nuts. I'm a sharp girl, Lemont. Try me. "Well, ok … So the demon La Llorona led me an the half-vampire to the forbidden door in the pyramid ... " Rrrumble. You mean "if we open that you'll end the world" WASN'T sarcasm? ... I think maybe I'll start at the beginning.
     
29. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-10-24 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-10-24 Pub. Date: 2012-10-24
Image Number: 88837
Caption: You are not alone, Clyde. I have walked with you from the beginning. I know every hair on your head. Every dream in your mind. … Every song on your iPod. "******" is actually a respectful term for "ladies." I wasn't born yesterday, Clyde.
     
30. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-09-20 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-09-20 Pub. Date: 2012-09-20
Image Number: 87547
Caption: There's death in the air, Clyde. I wonder if this is what the British felt when their empire began to die. TIME. Tell me, might those poor beggars the Romans have felt this very way? Blimey! When the noble Babylonians didst descend, couldst they have suffered thusly? Dang. This stinks. (Originally published on 9/30/10).
     
31. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-05-30 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-05-30 Pub. Date: 2012-05-30
Image Number: 81464
Caption: Do you remember the first thing that happened today? I woke up. I suppose that the first thing that happened today. Like the day only starts when you wake up. Narcissist. Shhhh. I'm trying to end the day. Spare change?
     
32. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2012-03-19 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2012-03-19 Pub. Date: 2012-03-19
Image Number: 77678
Caption: … So I replied "What do you mean you're charging me $90 for my birth-control pills? My insurance covers those." And guess what the pharmacist said, Mr. Fitzhugh. I couldn't begin to guess. He said "Apparently your employer switched you to a new plan that doesn't cover sluttiness." Sir, did you say to pretend you have an important call after ten minutes, or after fifteen? Five! Explain.
     
33. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-11-17 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-11-17 Pub. Date: 2011-11-17
Image Number: 72985
Caption: facebook. Messages. From SASHA MITCHELL. I can't leave Webster right now, Lemont. It doesn't matter how mean he is to me … I have children. When you have kids, your life isn't yours anymore. It’s theirs. If leaving a horrible marriage is going to make their lives worse, you STAY. Because your own life is over, over, OVER. Can we change the subject? How are YOU doing? I just won custody of Lionel. Tap tap ta- tap t- t- Um ... By all that, I meant to say your life is just beginning.
     
34. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2011-08-25 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2011-08-25 Pub. Date: 2011-08-25
Image Number: 64819
Caption: Candorville Chronicle. I don't envy your generation, Brown. In my day, every generation could expect to do better that it's parents'. But you ... you're the first generation that'll do worse. And it's just the beginning. But look on the bright side. What bright side is that? Compared to your future kids, you're doing great!
     
35. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2010-09-30 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2010-09-30 Pub. Date: 2010-09-30
Image Number: 52454
Caption: There's death in the air, Clyde. I wonder if this is what the British felt when their empire began to die. Tell me, might those poor beggars the Romans have felt this very way? Blimey! When the noble Babylonians didst descend, couldst they have suffered thusly? Dang. This stinks.
     
36. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-09-06 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-09-06 Pub. Date: 2009-09-06
Image Number: 38003
Caption: VH1 presents Where are They Now? The Some People Story. It was the mid-2000's. Politicians across the country relied on him. There wasn't a press conference around that didn't broadcast his beaming smile. I sound wise compared to him. And for one brief fearmongering season, the strawman called "some people" was at the top of his game. I've forgotten 9-11. I want to hug terrorists. But as often happens in the cutthroat false argument business, his star began to dim. I want to take your guns. Yawn. And it sent him on a downward spiral. He came into the bar already drunk, talkin' 'bout nobody's scared of him no more and no one takes 'im seriously. Bartender. ... an' I was like "bruh, you're bringin' down the whole room." Very bad tipper, too. But then, in his darkest hour, some people makes a surprising comeback. AFTER THESE MESSAGES...
     
37. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-07-12 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-07-12 Pub. Date: 2009-07-12
Image Number: 35974
Caption: Susan, what're you doing? Nothing, Lemont. I saw you, you just read the end of my short story before the beginning! So? So? I worked hard coming up with surprises! With twists! Turns! Reversals of fortune! And you just ruined all my hard work! Y'know, there's something wrong with you if you skip to the end of a story. It means you're controlling, and scared of surprises -- scared of life! That's just sad, Susan. Sad and pathetic. They should package you with each copy of your book so everyone can experience this. No story for you.
     
38. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-06-13 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-06-13 Pub. Date: 2009-06-13
Image Number: 35004
Caption: Dear IRS: I filed a tax return months ago, and you owe me a refund. You are now delinquent in your payment of my refund. Please contact me immediately to set up a payment plan. Otherwise I will have no choice but to begin collection procedures, such as placing a lien on your property or garnishing your wages. WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT DOESN'T WORK THIS WAY? Dios mio... It just doesn't.
     
39. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-06-08 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-06-08 Pub. Date: 2009-06-08
Image Number: 34999
Caption: Six months ago… Internal Revenue Service. ATTN: Lemont Brown. Please contact us immediately. You have not yet filed your 2007 tax return. If you do not file and make arrangement for payment, we will have no choice but to begin collection procedures. For instance... ...we may place a lien on your property or garnish your wages. YES I DON'T HAVE EITHER OF THOSE!
     
40. Comic Strip Darrin Bell  Candorville 2009-01-14 begin 
Cartoonist(s): Darrin Bell
Comic/Cartoon: Candorville
Viewable Date: 2009-01-14 Pub. Date: 2009-01-14
Image Number: 29375
Caption: The young slave Frederick Douglass, having witnessed the barbarity of his master for the first time, ran and hid for hours behind a tar-covered fence. He fell asleep and began to dream… I fail to understand. These slips of parchment bear the likeness of a slave, yet people buy them from you. These are inauguration tickets, kid. They put a photo of the next President of the United States on 'em. Oh. Did the president flog them for printing the negatives? You a strange little dude.
     
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